Scavenger-A Reylo story

Reasons

Uhh, wonderful. At least now he knew. She won't feel guilty for not telling him anymore.
She knew he wouldn't have a good reaction. That was obvious. But the words he spoke out, the way he's been talking to her...No she couldn't accept it.

///

He didn't have time to tell her anything. Yay.
He did apologize. But he knew it wasn't enough.
He really wanted to explain everything to her. To tell her how he felt. But something was holding him back: he didn't know if that was out of shyness, because he feared rejection, or maybe because he didn't like when strangers or even people he met several times, knew what he had inside of his head, knew  his feelings and his thoughts.
But Rey wasn't a stranger. He couldn't find the words to describe who she was to him.

"Hey."

Ben widened his eyes. Is his mind tricking him or...
No she was there.
He turned around and saw her seating on the floor.
He was so lost in his thoughts that he completely didn't sense them connecting.

"Oh hey. Again."

"What are you doing on the floor?"

"Nothing"

"Stand up, then"

He said that in a tone that sounded harsh. But he didn't want it.
Ben didn't like when she was like that. Kneeling on the floor.
It reminded him how she had collapsed on the ground, bursting into tears a moment ago.

She didn't stand up

"Stand up"he repeated

She didn't move.

"Well...I guess you're not letting me the choice."

As he spoke the words, he lifted her off the floor, a hand behind her back, the other hand at her knees.

She didn't do anything to stop him. He didn't expect that.

He gently let her go and she stood firm right in front of him.

"What did you come for, this time ?"

"Again, I'm not controlling this bond"

"I'm aware

"But you're right I needed to tell you something. "

"Which is ?"

He hesitated at first. He was afraid that he would say things he didn't want her to be aware of.

"I am truly sorry. For what I told you during the connection we had some days ago. I really didn't mean it. Sometimes I just don't know what's going on with me...and I let my anger take control...I'm really sorry."

///

"[...]...I'm really sorry."

She couldn't believe what she just heard.
Was he apologizing? To HER?
That's what it looks like.
Her eyes widened in surprise.
He was using the same tone he used when they were on the Cruiser.

Even if she was beaming inside, she did not let him see it. She wanted answers first.

"Why are you acting like that?"she asked

"What are you talking about ?"

"Don't play innocent with me, please."

"Then what do you mean by 'acting like that'"he continued, making quotations with his fingers .

"I don't understand. The way you behave with me is making me perplexed"she started "First of all you're being rude which I can understand, but then you become nice, the second after your insulting me, then you apologize...It looks like you're playing with me. As if I were a toy. I don't like that."

"Listen, I'm not playing with you at all, and if that's the impression you've got, I'm sorry about that." He said in the most genuine way.

"I hope so."

An awkward silent was dominating before she asked THE question, he didn't want her to ask.

"Then why did you kill Snoke and now you're still staying with the First Order ?"

"I have my reasons."

"Which are ?"

He didn't respond. That pissed her off but she could understand though.

The connection blurred and she was back at being alone in her room.