There All Along

Chapter Four

My stomach starts to rumble as I enter the school grounds. I skipped breakfast this morning and supper last night. My excuse? I had a sore stomach and eating would make it worse. I must admit I do regret lying to my mum, but if it was a way for me to skip food and keep Josh in my life I was prepared to make sacrifices.

"Hi Anna!" Olivia greets me. As soon as she comes up close to me she frowns and has a worried look on her face.

"What?" I ask her, trying not to sound rude.

"Are you ok?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"You look pale."

"Stomach bug," I lie. Ugh I hate lying to everyone!

"Oh. I hope you feel better soon. It must be the bug that everyone's getting around here."

Yeah the no-eat bug.

"Yeah, it must be that." I try to convince her.

"Anyways, see you at lunch.....oh wait. You're with him. Again," Olivia says with a not impressed look on her face.

"Yes, Olivia. His names Josh, by the way. And I wish you would stop fussing. He's my boyfriend. You're my best friend. I love you both very much," I remind her. I wanted to kiss her on the cheek but that would give off the wrong signals.

"Ugh whatever!"

"Love you too," I joke with a smirk on my face.

Just then the bell rings and we say our goodbyes then head to our next class.

..........

For the whole day I haven't ate a calorie. I'm starving! For the whole day all I could think about was food. But I'm proud of myself for not eating or drinking. I did however have bottles of water throughout the day which is fine because as everyone knows, water has zero calories which is amazing because it fills me up. But not enough. I'm starving. I feel like I could eat an elephant right now. An elephant and more.

I was really proud of myself today at lunchtime when I had skipped my meal. I showed off to Josh about it.

"I'm full after having all that water. I'm not even hungry! This diet I'm on is really working."

Josh smiles a little before saying, "good for you. I knew you could do it". I knew that would earn me a kiss on the lips but instead he kisses my forehead, just like what's he's been doing recently. It's like he doesn't even care.

Oh well, it was worth a try.

Although I have been successful today, I feel like crap right now. I am starving, shaky, sore....all because I haven't had a thing to eat today.

But then I remembered the trick I found online a few years ago......you can eat anything you want and not put on weight so long as you throw it all up afterwards.

So I went to the kitchen and grabbed a lot of junk. I grabbed cookies, chocolate, cupcakes, ice cream and pizza. My mum must have been in the bathroom because she was nowhere to be seen. So I ran upstairs before she could catch me. Emma must have been sleeping in her room because there was no noise in her room except for the tv playing;peppa pig I'm sure.

I opened my bedroom door, rushed inside then closed it behind me. I made it. I actually made it! I sighed of relief. I didn't think it was possible.

I sat down on my bed and started with the cookies. I quickly ate them, chewing every little bit as carefully as I could. After I had finished the packet a rush of guilt drowned me in my thoughts. But it was ok, I would just throw up afterwards and everything would be fine. So that's what I did.

Then I had the ice cream after, purged that. Then the cupcake, purged that too. I had the chocolate then purged straight after. Then I had the pizza which I purged and at last I finally felt like I'd accomplished something.

I went straight for the scales which was located in the bathroom and I stood on it. 7 stone 3. I was almost underweight. At this rate I'll definitely be underweight in no time.