Set Free

Chapter 6: Mother of Lies

Staring at Eddie and his shriveled figure on his knees sobbing on the 1980's themed floor of our work place made me shiver. Now it felt like the entire store could feel his pain as me and an older couple stared at him a booth over. I clambered out of the booth and knelt beside him on the floor comforting him by stroking his hair with my shaking hands. His mom stared from a distance her eyes wide covering her mouth with her hands. She had never seen her son since he was a happy child, nonetheless a destroyed mindless teenage boy who was forced to lose the rest of his childhood to growing up to work and go through drug withdrawal.

As his mother Mae bent down resting on her heels beside Eddie she stroked his hair not able to say anything, but the story her eyes told as she gazed at him were loud enough. Minutes later her sons crying came to an end as he sat up sniffling heavily still not able to meet Mae's eyes. I knew he must still be confused, or even angry. If he didn't like her in the end she could always run away back to her home hours away, but if Eddie liked her and she ran anyway, I couldn't imagine the pain it would cause. 

"Why're you here? W-where did you go after all these years?" He whispered as he looked at her with sharp fury burning in his eyes. His mom almost seemed afraid to answer, as if she said anything he'd hurt her anyway.

"I wrote you a letter, months ago. I gave it to Aydin and Reggy because I knew they'd run the business your father left behind. I realised in our time apart that you selling drugs wouldn't be the worst thing to happen, it would be losing you as my son. A son who no longer has a family. And for that, I am so sorry Seojun." She said and the room filled with whispers from the strangers who stared nearby. They now knew a part of his story. Hearing his real name out loud put a shiver through my body. I knew this couldn't be heading anywhere positive.

***

Eddie heard his real name whispered from her lips and couldn't contain what he felt. It wasn't sadness, happiness, or relief. It was anger in it's strongest form. At this point the only thoughts going through his mind, were the thoughts of destruction to himself by his favourite form possible. 

"You will never, ever,  have a place in my heart. What you said to me, even in a letter as a kid has destroyed me. I was on drugs Mae, do you know what that's like? How fucking  terrible I felt? I put fucking drugs  through my system to forget what you did to me and how lonely I felt after dad died. I'm 'so sorry' I disappointed you because I'm messed up. But I'm not going to sit here on this floor feeling bad about myself because I'm like this. I'm like this, because of you. Because you let this happen instead of telling me what he was going to do and taking me away from him." Eddie breathed heavily laughing and shaking his head crazily while tears dripped down his face. "And you know what? She's the only person who has ever tried to help me after you guys left and I met her months ago." He said pointing at me causing my insides to quiver in fear. "Could you imagine how alone I felt the years before I met her? Could you put yourself in my shoes and think that this is okay? Because it wasn't, and it still isn't. I can't take this anymore... I was not meant to handle this." He said standing to his feet, his legs shaking with every step. From what I could tell, he was sick and unwell. 

Watching him attempt to stand up was enough to break me and the customers around us. Eddie's loud voice and swearing about drugs had brought four other strangers standing beside him asking for help. One man went as far as to ask Mae to step back, as if one touch from her could kill him. As Eddie trembled at his feet I caught him in my arms as he swayed. From the years of drug abuse he was as skinny as a stick, stress and fear like this could shake him. 

"We can go home now, if you'd like." I asked him. He nodded yes with emotionless eyes and I hoisted him up with my arms. Carrying him out of the restaurant staring at his mother behind us who stared at him with a wavering mouth and eyes on the verge of tears. I wish I could tell her I was sorry, that maybe there would be a better time for this. But after seeing the hell it put Eddie through, I wasn't sure he'd survive seeing her again.