Kissing Away Insecurities | ✓

Chapter 45- Holding On To You

"What happened?" He asked looking down at her face.

She managed to curve her lips. "Nothing!"

He sighed. "Don't lie to me. That's something you are doing a lot these days!" His frustration was evident in his words. But he did not like it. He wanted her to pour her heart out to him. He would take care. He didn't want to find letters holding all that she wished to express.

She moved away sitting up straight. "I don't know. I just feel..like this way...and have never felt it before. " she found it hard to choose words. He always knew her so well without she having to spell it out. But this feeling wasn't just confusing her, it was confusing him as well.

"Like what?"

"I could be as strong as you were. But I was not!"

"You were Anika. You took all my responsibilities over yourself. From my duties towards my parents to office to social functions. You handed everything so flawlessly. You lived me Anika. You have no clue, because that's how good you were."

She gazed at him. She knew he wasn't lying. She knew he wasn't placating her. He meant what he said.

He cupped her face. "You just think you depend on me. Because that's how you choose to see things. You are independent, but paint yourself as dependent on me. When I was here your never went to office. I pushed you so may times. But all you said was you wanted to be a homemaker, be at home. It was your choice, I respected it. But I knew why. You wanted to be at home for me. When I came back from work you wanted to be there for me. "

She looked away. That was the truth. She never wanted to work because she thought she'd not be able to give him or her new family time. She chose it. She didn't want –in anyway, profession to come between them. She was sceptic about working in the same field. 

She knew his ego, she knew his pride, she knew the man he was outside home. She did not want to mess up their professional and personal life. Working for a company other than Oberoi, meant less flexibility and less time at home. She knew he loved spending time with her. She simply decided to choose to be a housewife and be home with her mother in law and be there for him when he came home at lunch and after working hours.

"Anika you've been the best wife. You've always been there for me whenever I needed a companion. You've stood by me through everything. You respected my decision of going abroad. I know I screwed up things there –I didn't keep my promise, because.." His voice trailed off and silence fell.

"Say it." She said waiting for him to continue.

"I didn't want you to see me as a failure. You believed in me. You freaking gave up your own career for me. You have done everything for me. Every thing. " his voice was deep. He was growing emotional as he spoke. But he maintained a clear tone.

"That's the least I could do. " he said biting his lips. Clearly able to see her wet eyes and tight lips.