I stayed up through every hour of the night staring at the same wall, motionless, not crying, not thinking, only breathing. I killed people, innocent people. I hadn't left my room since yesterday and I haven't seen anyone, not even Steve, I felt too exhausted to move from my position in my chair. I was flicking through news channels and they were all saying the same things but I still listened anyway, one reporter caught my eye and my finger stopped pressing down on the 'channel' button and I started to pay attention
"23 people were left dead and many more were left injured yesterday after an incident at Bury hall caused by the Avenger's new recruit, Adeline Maximoff. Adeline, sibling to Wanda and Pietro Maximoff proved she can't control her hybrid powers at the press conference that was scheduled weeks in advance so why do we continue to let these Mutants run wild when this is the outcome?" the sickly sweet reporter asks, I watched as the clip then cuts to videos of people in hospital recovering from... me.
My eyes were stuck on the screen and my lips parted as salty tears rolled onto them. There was an abrupt knock at my door but I didn't speak, I left them to decide whether they wanted to walk away or come in. I heard the door glide open and looked up to see Steve already walking in but I remained silent "Adeline talk to me, I'm your partner" I wiped my face dry as he spoke, he clearly noticed I wasn't going to make the first move
"It's my fault." I bluntly mumbled. I guess I was making the first move after all I have no control over myself.
"it's not, I'm meant to protect you and I couldn't," Steve said and rested his hand over my hand, using his other free hand to grab the remote and turn off the Television
"you can't protect me from myself" I replied with my voice quiet and monotone
"I can't but I'm going to help you" Steve looked into my eyes, his blue eyes looked exhausted and watery
"Steve... there was a voice in my head, it took complete control over me and I couldn't fight it" I whisper wiping my cheek and catching a tear with my sleeve
"I believe you" It's as if Steve read my mind "you can't fight everything"
"I'm so tired of fighting everything" the honesty flows out of my mind to my mouth
"you don't have too, we're going to do it together" Steve rubs his thumb over the back of my hand
"you can't promise me that Steve" the side of my lip curls ever so slightly
"I am, Adeline" Steve promises on his promise, he kisses my forehead lightly then exits my room, leaving me in silence. nothing changes the fact that I took away the lives of family members, siblings and friends, I could've tried harder to fight it, I could've controlled myself better... I could have been better. I started to hear muffled arguing downstairs, growing intrigued, I slowly approached my door and opened it, letting a slither of light into my bedroom the voices became more vivid
"voices in my head, my ass, she knew what she was doing" That was definitely Tony's voice, I knew he would be livid
"she's only young" Nat's voice hissed
"I didn't need another Maximoff causing havoc for us... another mutant" the more people used that word, the harder it became to deflect it
"you don't care about Adeline, Stark, you care about your company and how it makes you look" Steve stepped closer to tony
"She's my sister" Wanda shouted as Pietro held her close to him, I pushed the door open yet they still didn't notice me and continued to argue, I dragged my feet down the stairs not caring if I was to slip or if I looked presentable enough. my hand was shaky and I was wilted.
as I walked into the kitchen all eyes fell on me, I began to run water into a cup of off the draining board "do me a favour Adeline, learn to control yourself and don't break my glass" Stark said from across the room, my eyes screwed shut trying to stop tears from spilling but it wasn't successful, I didn't use my powers to smash the glass, I threw it down in the sink whilst tears mixed into the water, the whole room feel even more silent than before
"you and your sister are very similar, you murder the same way but just don't vex me, got that Maximoff" how could he be so cruel and filled with hatred, I watched with a blurry vision as Steve and Pietro stepped forwards to Tony in a threatening manner, I walked away and back up to my room with a blank face and mind.
-
it had been hours since I had last been downstairs but the arguing hadn't stopped till approximately half an hour ago, it just grew quieter and quieter until suddenly it was silent. I was sitting on the cold chair on my balcony watching the sun disappear behind the trees with an over-sized cardigan wrapped around me, the cold dusk air was hugging me gently and dried out my tears. "Adeline, we need you downstairs please" The sudden voice startled me, I turned around quickly to see Vision stood there, he was harmless unlike anybody else so having his presence here didn't make me feel vulnerable
"okay I'll be down any minute" I weakly smile up at him
his mouth opens but it takes a few seconds for anything to come out "are you okay Adeline"
"I'll be fine I just need to be alone, vis" I responded, not dropping my small smile as he nods and leaves.
I gave it a few minutes before I followed after him and left my room for the second time today. something about leaving my room and seeing anyone made me nervous and anxious but I couldn't coward away. when I reached downstairs everyone was gathered around the dining table in silence, waiting for me to get there "we have a new mission alert from Fury" Bucky smiled at me and pulled out the seat beside him, I shakily sat down.
"Fury found an address to where one of the weapons we recovered on our last mission was sent to" Steve carried on explaining to me "we've been in their system for the past week now and they have advanced technology beyond physicality, the only thing we can't access is who it is, they have that on lockdown and there is no way of breaking through that"
"okay" I hum quietly
"are you going to be okay to come?" Scott asks leaning down the table to see me, I see Peter, who is sitting opposite me, mouthing a plead for me to Join them on the mission, I sighed a heavy sigh then took a deep breath...
"when do we leave"
"we're not going anywhere, they're coming to us and it'll be the city centre they target" Rhodey chimes in "we stay stationed and hidden until something happens" I nod in response.
catching a break isn't on any of our agenda's.
