A Book of Dust and Breath

Chapter 33.1

Lily stood sideways, smoothing her dress down over her stomach and studying the effect in the mirror.

"You're perfection," Max said from the bed where he was tying his shoes.

"I don't look pregnant." She held the dress under her belly to examine the shape of it.

"I'm not sure what the right response is. I feel like this could be a trap."

She turned forward and put both hands behind her back. "Seriously. There's supposed to be... like... a little volleyball under my shirt. But it's not a volleyball. I just look swollen, like I ate too much salt."

He came close and stood behind her slipping his hands around her waist to rest on top of the gentle swell of her stomach. "You are the most beautiful girl in the world."

She met his eyes in the mirror. "My feet have grown a whole size. My feet. There is no baby in my feet. Why are they getting bigger?"

He kissed her neck. "Your feet are glorious."

"I have raccoon eyes, Max."

"Let's stay home. I'll prove how desirable I think you are."

She turned in his arms and pressed her palms against his chest. "You'd keep me in bed the rest of my days if it were up to you."

"True." He kissed her until she relaxed and melted into his embrace. He kissed her a little longer after that. "Offer stands."

"We promised Delbert and Gracie," she replied.

He found the breathlessness of her voice gratifying, indeed.

"I just need to get my shoes," she told him, pulling away and walking away into the next room.

He followed her.

She sighed.

"Seriously, Max. I'm just getting my shoes."

He held out his hands. "I like being close to you."

She slipped her feet into her black ballet flats. "You can't follow me everywhere for the rest of my life."

"I can," he argued.

She rolled her shoulders, stretching the tension out of them. His overprotectiveness came from a place of concern, but she was starting to feel like a plant kept under a blanket. "I left California to learn how to live free."

"I'll never stop you from living," he said, slipping his hands into his pockets. "I just want to make sure you're safe."

"From what?" She crossed to the dresser and chose a simple gold necklace. Clasping it around her neck, she said, "you can't protect me from everything."

"I can damn well try."

His calm reasonable tone irritated her as much as him dogging her every step. Don't fight, Lily. Not today. Today is Thanksgiving. Your first real holiday together. Do. Not. Fight.

Yesterday she'd convinced herself not to fight because it was the day before the holiday. The day before that she resisted because he'd come home from work staggering, almost too weak to stand. The day before that had been Monday. Fighting was no way to start the week.

At some point you're going to need to have this fight, a voice in the back of her mind said.

Not today, she silently responded.

She lifted her chin. "Ready to go?"

Late fall in Michigan held neither the bright life of summer nor the wonderland beauty of winter. Silver blades of icy rain slashed sideways through a grey sky and coated the dead, colorless world in a shimmering skin of gloom. The wind blew so cold it hurt her bare skin. The truck's heater blew air so hot she sympathized with all the turkeys being roasted that day. Her stomach rolled uncomfortably. She shifted, tugging the lap belt lower under her stomach.