"Yeah. It's true, mom. I'm...I'm dating Josh."
"That wasn't my question, dear. I was asking if you were okay with yourself about that."
"I mean...I guess."
"How long have you dated Josh?"
"Since-" he thought about the party. How immediately after he was pushed he basically threw himself and Josh outside and only a few minutes after, kissed him for the first time. But it wasn't a little peck. No, it was a deep kiss. For him, anyway. And he was leading them.
"Since Halloween."
"So only three weeks."
Really? It feels like much longer. More like two months. Of course, maybe the weather being unseasonably cold threw him off. "Yeah."
"Alright." His mother nods. "I wonder...if you...figured it out."
"What do you mean?" Tyler asked weakly.
"Figured out if...if you're gay, if you're bisexual, like that."
"I don't really...I didn't really think about it until I got together with Josh. That I was never crazy about girls for a bigger reason than 'I was raised right.' But I wasn't crazy about boys either. If I was, I'm pretty sure we all would have figured it out sooner." He laughs softly to keep from sinking into his emotions again. "I guess it was something I never really thought of. All these kids think they got it all figured out. And if they don't, they're quiet about it. Guess that kind of thing is still taboo."
"So do you know?"
"Not...not really. I'm surely not straight." He strains another laugh. "Maybe I can ask Brendon about it. Or Ruby. Or Josh."
"Whatever makes you comfortable."
"May I be excused?"
"Oh! Yes. I'll leave you alone now."
His mother left his room and closed his door while Tyler was already reaching for his phone.
Tyler: can I have some advice? (Delivered 6:11 p.m.)
What do his friends do at six in the evening? Have dinner, probably. That is if they do have a schedule. Maybe they're doing homework. Or something else.
Brendon: What kind (Delivered 6:12 p.m.)
Oh boy. How was he going to word this?
Tyler: identity stuff (Delivered 6:12 p.m.)
Brendon: Really? Again? I dont mean that in a rude way dw (Delivered 6:13 p.m.)
Tyler: i mean it's not really that important but i just wanna know (Delivered 6:14 p.m.)
Brendon: aight (Delivered 6:14 p.m.)
Tyler: so like when I hit puberty I tended to pride myself on not being crazy for girls. I just went with Jenna on that one dance bc she was the easiest to go w/ (Delivered 6:15 p.m.)
Brendon: and what about boys? (Delivered 6:16 p.m.)
Tyler: I either repressed it until you and ruby came out or I never gave it much thought til now. irdk dude (Delivered 6:16 p.m.)
Brendon: That's ok! Ryan's the same way but he did have a thing for girls. Like viciously. Then he met me lmao (Delivered 6:17 p.m.)
Tyler: this isn't about him (Delivered 6:17 p.m.)
Brendon: ik. And we were friends before that obv. (Delivered 6:18 p.m.)
Brendon: But about the attraction thing you might have to ask Josh or Ruby abt that bc I like yknow. "All" ppl so idk if I'd be much help lol (Delivered 6:18 p.m.)
Tyler: thx anyway dude (Delivered 6:19 p.m.)
Brendon: no problem. Always here 4 lgbt advice if u need it. (Delivered 6:19 p.m.)
So Josh is next.
It won't be difficult. Tyler wanted to text him since he got home anyway.
Tyler: i wanna talk about smth. it's not bad though (Delivered 6:21 p.m.)
Josh: ok. Im all ears (Delivered 6:21 p.m.)
Tyler: i never really questioned my sexuality before, crazy as it seems (Delivered 6:22 p.m.)
Tyler: i was never crazy for girls but not boys either. And it seems like most people know at like 12 or 13. (Delivered 6:23 p.m.)
Josh: I didn't know until this August. And I wasn't crazy about girls either so I could've taken a hint lol (Delivered 6:23 p.m.)
Tyler: but now I'm crazy about you (Delivered 6:24 p.m.)
Josh: ditto ❤ (Delivered 6:24 p.m.)
Tyler: so maybe I'm gay? (Delivered 6:24 p.m.)
Josh: sounds like it. But it's ok to not know right now. The world is so chaotic that it takes some people a lifetime to figure it out. If they ever do (Delivered 6:25 p.m.)
Tyler: that's scary (Delivered 6:25 p.m.)
Josh: I know it is. It's great to know and have pride in that but looking at the bigger picture it's not that important (Delivered 6:26 p.m.)
Josh: and we're still so young and desperate for attention that we want to put ourselves in boxes to fit in (Delivered 6:26 p.m.)
Tyler: yep (Delivered 6:27 p.m.)
Tyler: but I can still pick a label if I'm not sure, right? (Delivered 6:27 p.m.)
Josh: sure! But it'll feel weird at first and that's normal. At least it was for me (Delivered 6:27 p.m.)
Tyler: I'm gay (Delivered 6:28 p.m.)
Josh: now say it out loud and see how it feels (Delivered 6:28 p.m.)
It feels weird now just thinking about saying it. He mutters just barely loud enough to hear himself. Then a little louder, above a whisper. Then a normal speaking voice. He gets a strange feeling like embarrassment, but more sudden, like how it feels when he's close to Josh.
Tyler: I just don't want my little siblings to think different of me (Delivered 6:30 p.m.)
Josh: I'll promise you they wont. They're just kids and won't think much about it (Delivered 6:31 p.m.)
Tyler: but Zack is in middle school and from what I remember all those kids were really toxic. (Delivered 6:31 p.m.)
Josh: he doesn't complain about school does he? (Delivered 6:32 p.m.)
Tyler: not that I remember (Delivered 6:32 p.m.)
Josh: then he and you'll be fine (Delivered 6:32 p.m.)
Tyler: thanks fren. see u tmrw jish. <3 (Delivered 6:33 p.m.)
Josh: who does <3 anymore (Delivered 6:33 p.m.)
Tyler: me ( •} 🖒 <3 (Delivered 6:33 p.m.)
YOU ARE READING
True Colors (joshler, multi-fandom)
Fanfiction[Completed!!] Tyler and Josh have been best friends since elementary school. Entering their junior year of high school, they remain inseparable, but have made lots of friends since the start of high school. A little ways through the first semester...
