Effeminate | Jikook ✓

[00:62]

|| THIRD PERSON ||

you know what, despite the little argument they held not too long prior to this, the pair of boys were really good at pretending it never even existed in the first place.

its crazy to think about how in only about two weeks time, they still managed to become so weirdly close. it's almost like they were best friends in their past life or something.

(maybe even soulmates.)

that's the best way to go about describing it for now. they played the roles almost too well for someone not to.

jungkook ended up taking what the other blonde threatened to heart. he wasn't under any intentions of upsetting either of them. he wanted to befriend jimin. the boy wasn't like anybody he's ever met before. why would he ignore that?

besides, like he's said a thousand times already, most of the time jimin was a rather nice presence to be around.

when he wasn't in one of his seductive moods, he was just this tiny happy boy who giggled at everything and made the world all the more interesting.

if it wasn't blunt enough, jungkook's already seen the differences between jimin's stooping duality.

thats why he often found himself so puzzled.

which was the real him? like.. the real him. he had no idea. sure, he had a hunch, but when jimin himself was so back and forth it was difficult for the latter to determine for sure.

he's been managing pretty well so far, picking up on jimin's die hard habits of belittling himself because of something that wasn't quite known yet.

and yeah, despite not knowing the reasons for why he did that, jungkook wasn't wrong.

it's exactly what he did to himself each time he acted like that.

jimin was never genuinely the flirty type. the thought of having casual sex with random people made him cringe. sexual toys were something he only ever used to do it private. he didn't like that type of lifestyle, it made him uncomfortable.

clearly that wasnt the same deal anymore..

however, after something that happened a few years ago, he manipulated himself into a totally new lifestyle to protect himself from the same trauma ever recurring.

in simpler words, jimin forced himself to change. he wanted to be the person that he was told he should've been if he wanted to be of use to people.

awful, isn't it?

jimin had many uses to people, he wasn't just this body laying around for people to have their fun with. he was more than a sex fantasy, he was human.

except what was so horrible was that he still wasn't aware of this himself.

jimin's been corrupted into this mindset that with a charm as such, it's his job to reflect on it. he believed the words uttered to him once a few years ago.

" with a body like that, babe. you're never gonna be anything but a whore. keep your mouth open and legs spread if you want anyone to take you seriously. "

yeah.. it's awful. nobody should ever hear those words; that still didn't stop him from taking them to heart, that's exactly why he's the way he is now.

if the raven kept doing a fair job at depicting jimin and decoding his false exterior, then that's the only way he could ever truly be saved.

the blonde's not confident enough in himself to peer out of that slope, he's been demeaned and degraded for so long there's no hope for him seeing the other side of things.

thats why his little joke wasn't even really a joke.

jimin didn't necessarily wanna have sex with jungkook, based on the fact that he's just gonna leave him the next day and be incapable of offering more, but it wasn't something he was just doing for fun either.

it's what he convinced himself into believing he owed the younger.

jungkook loved sex right? so if he wanted jungkook to like him the way he likes him, then that's what he needed to offer him.

sex.

jimin wanted closure, he wouldn't deny that. he's just tricked himself into believing he was doing a good job at pleasing someone by letting them abuse his body.

in his mind it was like a way of receiving even the thinnest sliver of worth in return.

if jimin could give jungkook what he wanted, then he'd keep him around, simple as that.

regardless, that wasn't the case. jungkook didn't want sex with jimin any more than he didnt him. he's straight.

that didnt mean he was blind enough to slowly realize the game he's really playing though. that didn't mean jungkook wasn't observant enough with his new friend to realize the horrible type of shit he was putting himself through to feel valued.

it made him feel really pissed. not at Jimin, of course, but just in general.

it also defeated him that this was how the latter saw life and lived a new life: fulfilling other's needs before his own. that's no way to live.

as his friend, yeah, absolutely. jungkook was gonna help him out of it. he saw jimin a lot differently than his other friends, there was a different overall feel there.

he had every means of opening jimin's eye to the way he saw him instead.

jimin wasn't a disgusting anything in his eyes. he was someone who emitted more radiance than the sun.

jimin wasn't just a pretty body that could satisfy his needs. he was a valued friend that was starting to mean a scary amount to him.

jimin wasn't worthless to him. he was very much starting to possibly become a lot to him.

maybe it's time he went about trying to prove that.