Nightmares

Medicine

It has been a few days since I told my brothers. They took me to the doctor yesterday and I had to to them what I told my brothers. I held back my tears because I didn't like crying in front of strangers. The doctor told me the same thing as last time. Read more and be more active. He said I have to come back in a week and tell him how I'm doing and if they are not better by then he is going to give me some medicine for it.

We walked out of the doctor's office and went to the truck. I sighed. "That was a waste of time."

"No it wasn't. This is gonna help you." Soda was trying to stay positive. At least he was looking on the bright side.

"It didn't work last time, what makes you think it will this time." I shot back. I wish I hadn't said that because Soda's expression went from happy to concerned.

"Look, I know this is hard on you, it's hard on us too, but you gotta look on bright side. It will get better."

...

I woke up one night with a nightmare. I have had nightmares all week. I had a feeling the doctor's advice wouldn't work. It didn't work last time so why would it this time.  I tried to stay positive and look on the bright side like Soda had said but that was hard. The nightmares were still there and that made it impossible to think that it would help.

I woke up screaming and crying, like usual. "Shhh, Pony it's ok," Soda cooed. Soda held me and rocked me back and forth. He and Darry had been up with me every night and I knew it was affecting them.

"Go back to sleep," I mumbled. "I don't want to keep you up anymore. You've been up all week with me. I know your tired. Go back to sleep."

"Shoot Pony, I know your more tired then I am. I'm not going back to sleep 'til you do."

"Soda, I don't go back to sleep. I can't. They don't go away. They never have."

"It's okay. You go back to the doctor tomorrow. They'll do something."

"I hope so. I knew this wouldn't work. I feel like nothing works. Sometimes I feel like they will never go away."

"Don't think like that. They will."

We sat up for a little while. Soda finally feel back asleep, leaving me up by myself for awhile. Soda's words kept echoing through my mind. "Don't think like that. They will." I couldn't help but not think that. I've had these nightmares for 9 months and they never went away.

...

The next day we went back to the doctor. I told him that they never went away. He prescribed me a bottle of pills. They were anti depressants.

"I didn't want to give you these right away. I wanted to see how well you would do if you tried to get your mind off them and on other things. These pills will help you with your PTSD."

"PTSD? What's that?"

"Post traumatic stress disorder. It's a disorder in which a person has trouble recovering after experiencing or witnessing a terrifying event. Did I not tell you that last week?"

I shook my head. I don't know how someone can leave out a detail as important as that. "It's alright," Darry said, "Thank you."

"Your welcome. Come back in two weeks and tell us how you're doing."

I'm pretty sure the doctor said a little more, but I wasn't paying attention. I kept looking at the bottle of pills in my hand. I couldn't believe that all of this was a health disorder.