Good Girlz in the Hood : The Chronicles of Ciara

Chapter 33

It was the night of Meisha & Karina's birthday party. I was sitting on my bed in my dressing gown, tryna decide what to wear. I had so many clothes, yet so few options.

My feet were killing me, and so was my back. I'd had a dance exam today and I was completely worn out. Meisha had given me clear instructions to be at her house by 7 so we could take pictures etc... I picked up my phone and looked at the time. It was 6:55

Right on cue, my phone started ringing, with Meisha's name flashing up on the screen. I silenced the call and flopped back on the bed. I really didn't wanna go tonight, but I knew that if I didn't, I would never hear the end of it from them, especially as I had been being antisocial since I found out about Kyle and Chelsea.

I couldn't face them, especially Karina. I felt like everybody was laughing at me, yet again - just like after he slept with Camilla.

Then I realised something - Kyle was probably gonna be at this party, so why not make him look like the prick for once.

I rummaged through my wardrobe, and found my version of a 'Freakum Dress'. It was a Dark green, see-through top, with a black high-waisted skirt attached. After moisturising, putting on deodorant and putting on underwear, I put the dress on, along with some fishnet tights and black high heels. My hair was already done, so I went downstairs and asked my mum to drop me off at Meisha's house. We were talking now, but I obviously still wasn't happy about the fact that she lied to me...

I called Meisha and told her I was on my way. After cussing me out, she said she was saving me a bottle of Bacardi ;)

**

The parry was now in full swing, even though Rianna and I were sitting at the kitchen table getting drunk with Paris, we were still having fun. I stood up to go and get something out of the fridge and some random guy appeared from nowhere and started talking to me...

"I just wanted to tell you - I think your body is immaculate, babes" he said, and walked away...

Weirdo!

I managed to convince Rianna to come into the room where everyone was dancing but we didn't even get to chill for five minutes before someone came to pester us to dance with them.

While dancing with some guy who had no rhythm at all, I noticed a pair of white Nike Air Forces in front of me. You could tell they were fresh from the way were practically lighting up the whole room.

Unfortunately for me, the feet attached to the Air Forces belonged to Kyle.

From the look on his face, I could tell he was NOT impressed. I pushed the other guy away from me and went upstairs to Meisha's room - without looking behind me, I knew he was following me.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" he said, grabbing my arm

"Let go of me man, it's not like I was having sex with the guy, I was simply dancing with him."

"I don't care." He said, pushing me into Meisha's room and locking the door.

We sat in silence for a bit; I was only silent coz I was scared of what he would do, I didn't know why he was silent...

"Why won't you talk to me... what have I done now?" he said, sounding like he was about to cry

"Why did you lie about sleeping with Chelsea?"

He cleared his throat

"I lied because she called me and told that if you asked me I should lie..."

I shook my head in disgust

"She's the only reason you didn't know about it before as well, when we got together she called me and told me not to tell you"

"So when was this then? When did you fuck her brains out?"

He made one of those face, you know when someone says something cringey ...

"Like summertime 2008. it was only a few times, nothing serious - we both knew it wasn't going anywhere, just a fuck - just a quick fuck, every now and again..." he sounded really nervous, and looked like he was sweating.

Then something clicked in my head - in January 2009, Chelsea had had a miscarriage - she had been kinda far into her pregnancy, about four months...

"Were you the father of her baby?"

He looked baffled

"What baby, she aint got a baby... has she?" he started looking even more nervous...

"Her baby - the one she lost last January...?" when I said that he looked like he had just shit himself

"She was pregnant? She never told me nothing 'bout no baby... what the fuck man... ARGHH!!!"

"CALM DOWN U ASSWIPE! Knowing Chelsea, it probably wasn't even yours-"

"Call her - call her now, and find out."

I started feeling bad, Kyle looked like he was actually gonna shit himself. I took my blackberry out from under Meisha's mattress and dialled her number.

She answered straight away and started jabbering some bullshit, about me 'finally forgiving her'. She fucking wishes!

"I haven't forgiven you, don't get gassed. You see when you were pregnant-"

"(sigh) don't tell me you're pregnant?"

"No I am not. Anyway who was the father of your child? Was it Kyle?" I asked. She paused and then spoke

"I... I don't know. I'm not sure..."

"You're disgusting." I said, before hanging up the phone

Kyle looked at me expectantly.

"Soo... was it mine?"

I shrugged

"She doesn't know"

"So what does that mean for us?" he asked.

I shrugged again, unlocked the door and left the room.

"I'm so sick of having to forgive you for things, Kyle. I shouldn't always have to." I said, as I walked down the stairs.

He grabbed my arm again and I nearly fell down the stairs.

"I forgave you when you killed my child so shut the fuck up."

Just before he had said that, the music that was blasting out of the speakers stopped and everybody who was standing in the hallway was standing there staring at us...

**

Not even a week had passed, but everybody knew that I had had an abortion, thanks to Kyle. Nobody was saying anything to him, everyone was scorning me. I had finished my exams and all my coursework, so I hadn't been to college since the day of the party, coz I knew everyone would be talking about me.

I was laying on my bed, with my eyes closed, listening to my iPod.

Someone dragged me off of my bed and threw me on the floor. It was Anton.

"Leave me alone." I said, tryna get up but he kicked me down so I stayed on the floor.

"Did you think I wouldn't find out that you fucked that idiot? And then you were stupid enough to have an abortion and think nobody would find out."

I didn't speak...

He dragged me up by my throat and started squeezing. I could feel all the oxygen leaving my lungs.

I tried to scream but no sounds would come out.

He let go of my throat and threw back on the bed, but not before giving me a hard slap.

I just laid on my bed crying, the pain was so immense...

All I wanted to do was die. I got up and went into my mum's bathroom.

I was sick of living in a world where everyone just wanted to fuck me over.