Shizuo x Reader

Chapter 12

Shizuo POV

What the hell just happened!? I tried making sure she was alright and the next thing i know she went ape shit angry.
I tried to follow but that maggot grabbed my arm.
"Don't. I would chase her but trust me, she needs to be alone so she can gather her thoughts. Something is disturbing her and its only something she can do alone."
"No way in hell am i trusting you."

I stormed out after her but she wasn't anywhere in sight. It doesn't help that there's a lot of people around either.

I walked through the alleys we use when we go home.

Along the way i found a group of thugs crowding around something but i didn't care. As i walked past i heard a female crying.
...
No. (y/n) first.

I listened by walking slightly slower.

"I cant believe we captured her. Now darling, how about you be quiet and we will get this over quickly."
"Shi-"

I heard the woman calling for someone before the knocked her out.

They slumped her over their shoulder and that's when i noticed.
It was her!

"What are you doing with my woman!"

The group turned around and paled at the sight of me me.
They dropped her causing a loud thud and ran.
I needed to make sure (y/n) was alright. I will kill them later.

She was unconscious and so i took her home.

Your POV

I woke up screaming thinking i had been kidnapped by the group of thugs but i saw shizuos head above mine.

He was asleep while sitting.
I lifted my head off his lap and ran to the bathroom.
Shit... At least i know whats wrong with me.

I left a sign on the door that Rin would understand.
-Do not Enter. Code:Red.-

When Rin came home i heard him get the money out of the jar we keep in the living room and Shizuo went with him.
I was sprawled out of the bed.
...
I really need to apologise to Shi. I lashed out at him for no reason and i haven't been a nice person. First was the nightmare which he is concerned about and then i lashed out. I hope he doesn't think its his fault.
If he does then I'm a bad person. I guess i already am.
The amount of lives i snuffed out and the tears i have caused over these years. Lives ended by my hands. The tears from their families. I never stuck to a single age. I have killed children, adults, elderly. I have killed people by themselves, their entire families and friends.
And yet, i have a family. A son, and a lover. I can only imagine the pain those people felt. If i lost either of them i would feel like i have been ripped apart.
I felt the tears beginning to gather in my eyes and my vision began getting blurry.

I didn't hear my son enter and he hugged me and petted my head.

"Its the past mommy. If its your usual thought, killing is in the past now. You help people nowadays. Think how much your group has helped people. And i wont leave you for a long time. I promise you."

I felt bad for my son. He gets bullied for being frail and having a monster as a mother. Then I'm an emotional wreck. He takes care of me sometimes all because I'm weak.
" I'm so sorry you have a mother like me. I'm weak and im the reason you get bullied. I cant provide a happy and normal life like every other kid your age has. Im a shit mother and now your as mature as an adult. I ruined you. You should be goofy but your serious. Its my fault im sorry. Im sorry. Im - "
" Why?! I now know how to help people and take of people with injuries or who are ill. I am polite and have manners and i am thoughtful. Everything everyone isn't. You raised me well. Taking care of you occasionally is the least i can do. You had me and raised me even though you were nothing and had nothing.
When you were homeless and 16 you had me. Instead of abandoning me and fending for yourself like most people would do, you actually kept me and protected me. I am grateful for the way you raised me. And I'm glad I'm mature. So thank you. Thank you for having me and raising me. "

My son made me cry. He was too nice to me. He is smart enough to be in college because he works and study's all the time. Its not for school. He wants to get scholarships so i don't have to worry about funding. He's 5...i have ruined his childhood by being me. I am...
A terrible mother.

Rin POV {Suprise fuckers!! XD}
I felt bad for mommy. She thinks its always her fault around this time of the month. She feels like i have no childhood i enjoy or will remember as happy when i grow up.
Playing has never really been an option. Ball games hurt my wrists and i cant run fast because of my weak legs. I cant do monkey bars because i pull my arms out of their sockets.
TV and Gaming consoles are my only option but i have always been conscious of moms money and the bills. I learnt this from the books in the library about adult life's. I started teaching myself higher grades constantly moving up so when i take entrance exams, i can apply for scholarships. That way mom doesn't have to keep worrying about money.

I remember when she could work in any decent establishments so she would work indecent jobs at night just so we could scrap by.
She had always forced a smile and said she was fine. But she would be covered in bruises, cuts, or even marks. She always covered them the best she could with makeup though.

Growing up wasn't the easiest but i had my mother who always did everything for me and then there was Liz's family who helped us and takes care of us when we need it.

When mom gets ill, or in a mood, or due, i always take care of her. I have learned what comforts her and what angers her.
So now i can take care of her effectively.

I also learn to cook from Liz on the rare occasions. Mostly Liz buys food so its not very often...

I wonder what moms life would be like if i didn't exist but not in a suicidal way.

Although around this time of her month, she often thinks about suicide and sometimes acts on it but that's why I'm always near and never let her be alone.  Even if i have to skip school.

So i wish Shizuo lick for this week is going to be the definition of hell.