PURE HEROIN

XV.

15 | Pure Heroin

Exodus scanned the short list in her hands while simultaneously pushing the trolly forward. Her mother had sent Juels and her to the store to pick up a few items.

Juels had wondered off some minutes ago in search of six cartons of eggs and a large container of powder ice tea mix. While exodus stayed in the gardening department comparing fertilizer. crouching down and staring intensely at the different types in the front of her, she wondered which one to choose.

She didn't completely understand why her mother continuously tried to resurrect the peony bush. Seeing as it was practically dead from the day she planted it. It seemed like a wasted effort, helping something that didn't want to be saved.

"Get the elixir brand. It keeps the bugs away and the plants look healthier in two weeks." A voice said behind her. Turning around to thank who ever it was Exodus was pleasantly surprised to see a familiar face.

"Jen?" Exodus broke out into a large smile at the sight of the the blonde haired woman.Jen was one of the chief directors for the American Ballet Theatre.

"Oh my god Exodus? Its been awhile. I didn't know you were in New York?"

"I'm not. I'm in Chicago for a minute I just came down to see my parents." She turned away for a second to place two bags of the fertilizer into the trolly.

"We really miss you Exodus."

"I miss you guys to." Exodus sighed crumpling the list before jamming it into her back pocket.

"Do you miss us enough to come back?"

Exodus stared back into blue eyes trying to figure out if she had heard her right.

"We're taking the Black Swan on tour at the end of August. Theres one last solo lead open, we could renew your contract." Jen said eagerly. Noticing Exodus hesitancy to reply she quickly continued, "I don't need an answer right this moment. Sleep on it and if your interested give me a call."

Exodus silently stared down at the business card between her fingers. She was still in disbelief that this was actually happening.

"You wouldn't believe how long it took me to find this type ice tea." Juels shook her head walking with arms full of egg cartons and a ice tea container balanced on top. She walked over to the trolly depositing them carefully inside nodding her head slightly in a greeting at the woman next to Exodus.

"Think about it okay?" Jen adjusted her handbag onto her shoulder. "It was nice seeing you Exodus." She smiled before pushing her own trolly down the aisle.

"Who was that?" Juels asked curiously.

"Just...someone I know." Exodus pushed the trolly heading in the opposite direction to get to the cashier.

"Do your parents really need six dozen eggs though?"

She laughed loudly shaking her head. "Its three things that make my dad happy in this world besides my mum. Ice tea, Aspens and eggs."

-

Exodus squatted in the dirt next to her mother helping her weed the peony bush. "I don't understand your obsession with this plant. Its dead." she grumbled pausing to wipe the light sweat that had gathered on her forehead.

"Some things just need a little more time Exodus. When its ready, it'll bloom." Her mother said pulling up a weed and throwing it to the side joining the little hill developing. It was quiet between them as they both worked diligently, but Exodus's mind was else where and her mother could tell.

"Something is bothering you."

"I saw Jen today, they have a production going on tour at the end of next month. They want to renew my contract." Exodus felt her mother's eyes on the side of her face but she continued to do what she was doing.

"Do you want to go back?"

"Yes. No. I don't know... My mind is all over the place."

Exodus felt her mother's gloved hand on her shoulder, "In life we sometimes have not chosen the safest path. We've made mistakes, plenty of them. sometimes we jump too soon and fail to appreciate the consequences. But I've learned something important along the way, I've learned to heed the call of your heart. I've learned that the safest path is not always the best path and I've learned that the voice of fear is not always to be trusted. So if your heart is telling you go, go."

She nodded her head watching as her mother got up to sprinkle fertilizer under the peony bush. Following her heart would have been easy, if her heart knew what it wanted.

Late that night Exodus sat in the porch swing allowing her feet to brush against the ground. She was alone in her thoughts, Jen's business card burning between her finger tips. Her mother's words from earlier swirled around in her head. Exodus wanted to know when making a decision had become so hard.

Absentmindedly she flipped the card over and over, looking for what, she didn't exactly know. Anything she supposed. Anything that told her she was making the right decision.

Picking up her phone from the seat next to her, Exodus chewed on her bottom lip for a minute. She dialed the number.

"Hello?"

"Jen, its Exodus."

-

"I cant believe your leaving already, we just got you back." Exodus's mother frowned as the announcement for their flight's departure came over the intercom.

"I know mom, I'll be back I promise." Exodus hugged her mother tightly kissing her cheek. Stepping away she allowed Juels to hug her mother goodbye.

"Come here little girl." Her dad said engulfing her into a hug. Inhaling his Old Spice cologne Exodus struggled to keep her tears at bay. She promised herself that she would not cry.

"I love you, please be safe. And call your mother once in awhile or she'll drive me crazy." Exodus laughed not even realizing she had indeed started crying until her father wiped the wetness from her face.

"I love you daddy." Exodus said as her father let her go. She couldn't make herself move from that spot. She'd known this moment was coming, and now that it had arrived Exodus found that she had no strength in her limbs.

Even though they were standing a couple feet away, they might as well have been a hundred thousand miles apart. She felt the loss of them before they had even left.

Exodus didn't want to say goodbye. Words were stupid. They said so little. Yet they opened up holes you could fall into and never climb out of again.

Juels gently gripped her wrist pulling her away when the last call for their plane alerted. Exodus glanced one more time at her parents, noticing her mother's teary eyes, she blew Exodus a kiss mouthing "I love you."