Unsheathed Heart

Him

Warning: May be a little sappy.

Everyone has their first love, I just feel like I experienced it a little too late or maybe it was perfect timing  for me. He was my first crush and my first heartbreak. We could've been so much, but instead we became nothing. I catch myself going back to our messages to get a good laugh or to pick up my mood. Even if he's not with me he's still here, looming over me and sometimes I let him descend back into my heart, but he leaves as simple as he came. I replay the times we would sneak away to Starbucks just to talk and be in each other's presence. I recall the way his eyes glistened as the sun shown through the window. I remember the "I love you's" and promises that turned out to be hollow words with no meaning. He was one of those guys that you would want to go star gazing with and talk about the meaning of life. If anything he was my bestfriend and I loved him dearly with every inch of my soul. Nowadays we can't even look at eachother. It hurts to see the one person who promised to protect me leave without a second glimpse. It stings knowing that maybe I wasn't as important to him as he was for me. No, I didn't revolve around him, but my heart feels like glass. He had taken my discarded shards and put them back in place only to shoot it to pieces in the end. Now I'm recovering the pieces of me and putting myself back together. One eye opening lesson I learned is hope for the best, but prepare for the worst. No one knows what's going to happen in the end and that's okay just remember to push forward because in the end it will be worth it.