Call Me Helpful but its CallMeKevin

13

Another sleep on the bed, with Kevin what a surprise. Of course he just slept on me, but it looked like he woke up a while ago since I shifted to him to see him on his phone. He didn't look so comfortable so I got off of him to look at him, his arm must've got cramped since he was staying still just for me. I felt terrible for him.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to sleep on you again." 

"It's okay, I wanted to chill with you." Kevin set his phone down. "No wonder your boyfriend broke up with you. You snored right into my ear like twenty minutes ago." He laughed, making me shy away from him slightly. I looked away only to be reminded that myself was something more miserable since the fact that even a dick like my ex didn't want me. Kevin noticed me doing so, and fell to awkward quietness. He coughed softly, to break the fragile ambience. "Sorry, I didn't mean to do that to you..."

Brushing back of my hair because I felt it messed up during my sleep, I turned to him. "Its okay... it's not you."

"Then what's wrong?" Kevin then turns to his side, laying on it in facing me even more prominently. "You got your money back, you got revenge on your ex fiancee... and you get to live your life even more without him!"

I stood up, walking slowly away while holding my arm. "Its just, I spent such an important part of my life on him... then he doesn't even love me for that." I closed my eyes, clutching into my arm harder than before. "I cut off connection from you because of what we did that night."

Kevin stood up instantly, as I've finally started to talk about it. "But you were on a break with him..." He started. "I didn't know you were gonna go back to him after your big fight!" He explained the things I already knew.

Feeling my lip quiver in border of tears, so I put down on to it so I wouldn't have to worry about it. I felt like I was stabbing myself in the arm with my fingers digging deeper every time we say a word. I have to continue it even though it was so uncomfortable to do so, then so I turned to Kevin to look him in his beautiful eyes.

"I was the one who forced you." Kevin stepped closer. "I had too much to drink, you were joining in and then... you just looked so..."

My ears perked up, as I stepped closer.

"You looked so cute, and I just wanted to know how you felt in my arms." Kevin stepped closer too.

Getting in closer I was four feet away from him.

"I loved everything we did, and if you didn't get that damn text in the morning from him..." He stepped in close enough to set his hand on the one practically tearing my skin and made me relax. "I wouldn't have done anything." His hands dragged down as he grabbed the other one. "You wouldn't talk to me because you told him all that I did."

My hands squeezed his, the moment was now.

"I just didn't want things to change, when he wanted me back I just wanted things to go back to normal..."

"Well, it can't go back anymore..."

Our breathing surrounded the room, conflicting my thoughts but I just knew something was always there that he would always make me crave to go back to him even when I was with my ex. I knew that he was important to me, and I had to cut him off so I could make myself think... that we weren't supposed to be like this.

"When I pushed you away..." I started, my hands dragging up to his shoulders. "I lied to myself that there wasn't anything between us... that there was no moment shared of a kiss or any 'I love you's..." I started to pull him down to my height. "I wanted you, but our friendship was something I valued even more... but I lost that the moment I told my ex." I wrap my arms around his neck.

"It was a huge mistake..." Kevin set his hands on my hips, pulling me into him. "But it was the best feeling in the world to have you everyday besides claiming you and I would do it all over again..."

That was it, it made me pull him in and kiss him so deeply. The past tension, the confusions, and the moments we've spent together these days made the moments we've had before we had that night together made me realize one simply thing about him that I always repressed.

Pulling away slightly, his lips followed me to encourage the kiss only breaking in parts but making every move smooth to kiss me, but when I was at his limit he couldn't follow my lips anymore and was forced to let me go. Instead of stopping, I pecked him one more time as I wanted to get that extra one. Our breaths were heavy and I saw him smiling about it.

I need to say it.

"Kevin, I love you."

"I love you too."