“And why do you look disheveled?”
“Nothing I promise,” he said walking inside.
As soon as he did his mom was yelling spanish words at him. Normally he would argue back and put up a defense but instead he kept a poker face as she yelled. This probably made her more angry but he didn’t care, his thoughts consumed like a little kid with chocolate cake, he was everywhere. Kinkade, school, Matt, Ryan, James, Keith, Matt, Pidge, Allura, Keith, Ryan, Hunk, His mom, Keith, Ryan, Keith, Keith, Keith, Keith and so on. He screamed , it was a normal scream not high pitched more like a roar, but not as vibrant he wanted it to be raw but he wasn’t hurt he was angry.
“Go to your room,” She said, anger filled her mouth pouring out like tar, pouring onto him.
It was stuck, but this wasn’t anger it was concern and worry and anxiety like it had morphed from when it left her mouth and when it got to him. He walked to his room, his legs were getting heavier and heavier. Anxiety, he knew it but why did it feel like this, his heart felt like it was breaking while going 100 mph, he felt that if he talked or even breathed he would vomit, his head spun but not in a dizzy way a confusing and distracting way. He needed to talk to anyone about anything, as crazy as it sounded it calmed him to talk.
Calling Pigeon…
“Lance hey, what’s up?”
“Pidge, hey I don’t wanna bother you, I just need to talk.”
“You not bothering me, you never could so what’s wrong?”
“It’s a long story but at the moment I’m having a panic attack.”
“Lance do you want me to come over?”
“No, maybe if you want but I think I’m grounded so if you do, you might have to come through the window, but don’t hang up.”
“I won’t,” she placed the phone away from her face, “Allura, I need to go to Lance’s.”
“Ok I’ll come too,” she was quick to reply.
“Can Allura come too.”
“Yeah, but she is gonna be pissed at me.”
“What why, also we are leaving now.
“I did something terribly stupid well probably three.”
“Tell me now before we get there so I know and Allura won’t have to really hear it.”
“No, news will break out soon I’ll just tell you guys when you get here.”
“We are on your road just tell me.”
“It involves someone before the accident.”
“Open your window we are here.”
Lance hung up and opened his window, thank heavens for being on the 1st floor. “What did you do Lance?” Pidge immediately asked while pulling him into a hug.
“Sit down,” He pushed Pidge back and sat on his bed while the other two sat on the beanie bags he has.
“Ok so don’t get mad,” he put his hand up stopping the upcoming talks. “I fucked Ryan and am now dating him, also while all of this was happening I was supposed to be watching Theo and Honey.”
“Lance why,” Allura lectored.
“Allura, calm down, but Ryan, like Ryan Kinkade the one you got in trouble for sexting in 9th grade.”
Lance coughed ashamed of his past, “Well yeah but that was joke then I was and am 100% straight, so please.” He felt like he was shaking the other symptoms had gone down and started to calm down but the shakiness always increased when he started to.
“Yeah straight as a rainbow, now why did you do it.”
“Well, I was mad about Keith and decided that it was a good idea and I was sick of questioning and being in the blurry line. Ok I was acting out and at the end I wasn’t thinking and asked him out, I’m sorry,” his eyes started to fill with water, he felt so weak for wanting cry at a moment like this infront of them.
“Ooh Lance it’s fine, we’re just worried,” Pidge said getting up sitting next to him.
Allura was a little jealous mixed with anger stirred in a pot she wanted to leave but cared about Lance. They were whispering and Allura couldn’t hear them, Pidge giggled they resembled a couple, she felt left out a serious third wheel.
Keith laid on his bed, thinking about everything. He had just fought with James, about where their relationship was going he honestly didn’t care he just wanted James’s opinion. James couldn’t even see them after high school, Keith couldn’t either but he wanted to hear something different that maybe they had a chance, maybe he just wanted to fight he didn’t know.
Me: Hey Lance I’m really sorry I was just nervous and angry
Deleted
Me: Lance please just message me
Deleted
Me: Lance I need you
Deleted
Me: In a fucking week you have had such an impact please don’t give up on me, sorry
Deleted
Me: Lance I accept I wanna be part of your friend group and see you everyday and talk to you everyday for 9 months I’m sorry
Deleted
Me: FUCK Lance I’m sorry
Deleted
Keith was now crying, at how much he wanted to hit send but couldn’t, how much he fucked up, and how much he was sick of himself. The tears fell, just kept falling he tried to remember the last time he cried he didn’t even know, he didn’t cry the day his parents abandoned him, or when people left him with disgusted face because of his sexual orientation, just never, the last had to be when he was little. He has been suffering from Depression the absence of Serotonin, which keeps you happy, and his brain has stopped reacting to immense pain. He didn’t care he hated the meds they just made it worse so he didn’t take them.
Someone fucking shoot me in the fucking head please
YOU ARE READING
Rumours☆A Klangst Modern Fic
FanfictionI want you I'll colour me blue Anything it takes to make you stay Only seeing myself When I'm looking up at you -Troye Sivan In which a group of dysfunctional gay teenagers try at the game of love None of the characters are mine blah yep I own the s...
