On the Run: The Texas Files ✔

Chapter 40: The Pain of the Broken, Beaten, and Damned

"Hey, sunshine," Parker says. Parker is staring at me, running his hand through his hair. He smirks.

"Hi," I say.

He looks as he always does: handsome as ever. "Can I ask you something?"

I nod. "Of course." I will tell you anything you want to know.

"Are you all right?"

I nod. "Why?"

He bites his lip. "Because you look nervous. Are you thinking something you shouldn't?" He winks.

I bite my cheek. No. I'm not thinking about it. Or maybe I am. I don't even know. Everything with him is so complicated, but it's also so easy too. We fit together like a puzzle. We both know loss. We know trauma. We know pain. And death? Well, Death is our old friend.

Parker is one of the only things I have right now. I have baseball too, but it's not as comforting as someone who you spend all your time with...

I gently reach out to touch him. He's warm, not like a fever, or like most people are. He's like a blanket. He's warm, safe, and able to protect me from all of the monsters.

I'm a strong person. I have never needed a person to protect me. My trust issues prevented me from forming a bond with another human being. Those same issues burned the bridges of those who I already had.

But Parker is different. He somehow managed to work his way in. I don't know how he did it. He's my opposite. He's irrational, unpredictable, and emotional. Three things he taught me how to be.

And now, those three things may be my downfall.

I pull him to me as I grit my teeth. I bury my face into his chest to stifle a scream. My back is burning. It's got to be on fire. There's no other explanation for this agony. I'm a moment of pain, of weakness, of need, I grab the back of his head and kiss him.

I let my body fill with the electricity that our kisses bring. My body rushes with temporary, fake dopamine. I was saving the kissing for when I desperately needed it, but I gave in. I needed pain relief. The burning becomes more intense. It's starting to smell now.

Parker is still smirking at me. "You know, at the library back in October, I'm so happy you smiled at me. Like really smiled."

Steady tears fall from my eyes as I nod. "Yeah," I whisper. "Me too."

"I hope our daughter gets your smile. And your eyes. She's going to break so many hearts." he says.

I sniffle. Our daughter? What is he talking about? I nod again and choke out, "Yeah. She will if she gets your smirk."

He chuckles. His face then quickly drops into an emotionless, dead stare. "You're avoiding it."

"What?" I ask.

"The inevitable."

He pulls me to him again, and my back is burning again. This time it's different.

Parker. He's burning me. It's boiling hot metal against my skin.

I sob and gag. My skin is charring.

"Wake up, sunshine," he whispers in my ear. "You think this is bad? It's about to get a hell of a lot worse."

~~~

I once read that the smell of cooked human flesh is almost no different than the smell of a barbecue during the summer.  I don't think this applies to smelling your own burned flesh. It's indescribable. I love the smell of beef cooking on a grill. Correction: loved. This experience may make me become a vegetarian...