if i believe you ✓

→ ET FINIR

COLE SIGHS AS HE TAKES a seat next to his husband on the hotel bed, and they stare at each other for a while.

"I'm sorry." Luke starts, and he laughs nervously. It doesn't seem right to be having such a scary conversation in such an unfamiliar place, but here they are, having said conversation.

The words seem inadequate for everything they have to say to each other - they managed to make it all such a mess that there has to be some way for them to get things right again. Luke is basically dependant on the hope that he can fix it.

"I'm sorry too. But Luke, please remember I love you with all of my heart."

Luke nods and smiles against the tears in his eyes, because he knows what's going to happen. He knows what's coming next. It's the only thing that could plausibly come next.

"Are we... breaking up?" He asks in a small voice, and the words seem to strangle and choke him.

To Luke's relief, Cole shakes his head. He isn't sure why. Sure, Luke has hurt him, but it's happened vice-versa as well, and so Luke knows that actually, maybe it is more beneficial for the two of them to accept it went wrong from the start.

"No, no, I don't want to break up with you." He says, and Luke relaxes significantly. The thing he was most scared of, and it seems to have passed.

Naturally, Luke likes to mess everything up for himself. "But... Why not?"

Cole moves closer to Luke and shuffles around to face him fully. "Because I don't want to. Because I don't want us to say that we'll carry on being friends, and then let the internet tear us apart, or we just don't talk. I can't bear the thought of that."

This makes sense, and Luke nods robotically as he thinks through the events that have led up to this cliff-edge. "So... What are we doing, then? I don't think we can just pretend we're fine, Cole."

The boy stares at the floor as he thinks, before finally looking back up at Luke. "I guess..." He laughs a little under his breath at the thought. "I guess we can call this a hiatus."

There's a bittersweet partial smile on the blond boy's face as he meets Cole's eyes. It hurts a little, but it'll all turn out fine. The chanting voices in his head are clouding all rational thought, and Luke has to press his eyes shut to allow himself to form coherent sentences. He'll make it all alright. They'll find a way through.

"Well then... I guess everything good in my life has a hiatus, then, doesn't it?"