Lessons From Romance

Keep Calling Me

"I'll drive you home," Ki Chan offered following her from behind closely so that if she fell he could catch her.

Namjoo felt her body sway from side to side and she nearly stumbled off the walk before he grabbed her arms.

"I said I'm fine," Namjoo shrugged him off and drunkenly walked toward her car.

"You can't drive in your state," Ki Chan tried, but Namjoo unlocked her car and pushed him back.

Holding a finger out to warn him she mumbled, "Don't you dare stop me."

Pulling her feet in she closed the door, started the engine, and drove off.

There was an excruciating headache pounding her skull the next morning. Her stomach was completely empty and the whole world seemed to be spinning. Stumbling into her kitchen she tucked some soup into the microwave and sat down resting her head into her hands. The phone started ringing a moment later interrupting her moment of peace.

She reached for it with closed eyes and pressed it to her ear expecting it to be from home or work; even worse, Ki Chan.

"Namjoo."

Her eyes opened immediately and her pulse raced. Forgetting the surging headache she rose to her feet; the chair loudly scrubbing the tiled floor as it moved back.

Was she dreaming?

"Hey, it's me."

Namjoo pressed her lips together as Kai's voice hugged her eardrums. While her breath caught in her throat she imagined herself bawling into the phone, telling him how hard it had been for her. And he would understand...he'd coax her with the greatest words of comfort and he'd listen to her cry her heart out.

"Hi." Namjoo calmly greeted.

"You changed your number. I couldn't get to you, so I called home."

"Oh...yea."

"Did you just wake up?"

"Mm..."

"How are you? Is everything good over there? You've been taking care of yourself? Eating your meals on time?"

Namjoo wanted to tear up and tell him nothing was good. She wanted to cry and tell him to come home; that she needed him.

"It's fine," Namjoo replied; an invisible force squeezing her heart. "I'm still healthy, up and about."

"Are you sure? Dad says you haven't been home in a month. Is everything really ok?"

"Of course," Namjoo sounded enthusiastic all the while her face remained stiff, "you know I can take care of myself. I'll be going home this weekend, so don't worry. Anyway, how are you? Is everything going well?"

"It's great over here! The air by the ocean is the best! Come over here for vacation. I'll take you sight seeing and shopping," Kai suggested. "You have to come."

"I'll keep that in mind."

"It's good to hear your voice, Namjoo," Kai's voice sounded softer; so near to her. "I'm happy that everything's going well for you. My sister has always been a lucky person."

Namjoo blinked and pulled on a smile while watching another image of herself cry, "You too."

"I have to get back now. I'm hanging up."

"Take care," Namjoo bid her farewell, "Kai."

And when she heard the dead dial tone another part of her heart shattered as she stood there in silence. This...was the way it was supposed to be...from the very beginning to the very end.