Safe Together | Drarry (Unfinished)

6.) Draco's Mask

Draco fell into the Common Room couch, throwing his arm over his face.

The tears stopped after he left the scene of his panic attack. His heart was beating normally now, and he regretted everything that just happened.

He shouldn't have let his guard down, let Harry get to him. He should've just avoided talking to him in the first place.

What was he thinking? That Harry would just like him and everything would be fine and dandy?

There's a war, and they're on completely opposite sides. He can't get close to Harry, especially Harry. Voldemort would torture him into oblivion if he knew about Draco's feelings.

But Harry said he doesn't care about your family.

He also doesn't know you're a Death Eater.

Draco grabbed the nearest pillow and let out a frustrated scream into it, hoping it would silence his thoughts.

"Potter?" Pansy was standing at the door holding her potions book.

Taking Draco's silence as a yes, she walked over to the couch, moving Draco's legs to sit down, then placing them back on her lap.

"Talk to me." She stroked his leg, trying to calm him down.

Avoiding Pansy's eyes Draco finally responded, "Pansy, I know... I know you said to stay away from him. And I'm trying. I'm trying so bloody hard. But when I'm around him I feel like... like I... I don't know."

"You can tell me. Seriously, if there's anyone you can tell, it's me."

Draco sighed, letting his walls, he spent so long building, crumble, "I feel like I can be good when I'm with him. He's told me that. He's said I'm not like the rest of my family. And truthfully, I don't want to be like my father. I don't want to be a Death Eater. I don't want any of it!"

Pansy was silent, contemplating what he said.

"Pansy?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm just thinking."
Draco sat up on the couch, facing her.

She looked into his eyes, "I'm your friend, Draco, and I support you. I'll love you even if you want to be a soft Gryffindor lover."

"Not helping."

"I'm getting there, let me finish. I know you feel trapped, you can't change your family and you can't help fancying Potter, for whatever reason," she mumbled, "but you can change yourself. Maybe, just maybe, you should let Potter help you."

Draco sat up abruptly at that, "But you said not to, you said ignore the feelings and-"

"Well maybe I was wrong" she moved Draco's legs to stand up, turning to face him on the couch, "I don't know the right thing to do in this situation. These are dark times Draco, almost anything you could do would be dangerous. I just want what's best for you and, Merlin I can't believe I'm saying this, but maybe that's Potter."

"You really think... But Pansy I'm a d-death eater. Voldemort lives in my house. How am I supposed to let Potter help me when I'm supposed to be against him?" Draco ran a hand through his now messy hair.

"Draco, darling... I don't have the answer as to how this makes sense. None of this makes sense."

Draco didn't know what to say. She was right, he knew she was. A moment of silence passed between the two as Pansy paced back and forth in front of the couch.

"He used my first name."

Pansy almost jumped at the sudden comment. "You mean Potter?"

"Yeah, he... he called me 'Draco'."

"Wait is that why you freaked out and ran out of Potions?"

Draco nervously bit his lip as he remembered what happened not long ago.

Pansy shook her head and sat next to Draco. "You can talk to me."

"Well.. it's just that... he was pestering me about how I should confide in him and he was just... so close." Draco was almost visibly shaking already, and Pansy took his hands in hers.

"And... and my mark stung. It stung, Pansy, is that normal? Like needles, like a thousand needles. And then he said my name, whispered it." Draco's eyes were starting to water but he quickly gathered his emotions.

He put his mask back on, sitting up straight and letting go of Pansy's hands. "And it was abnormal and won't happen again."

"Draco, you can't keep doing this."

"What are you talking about."

"You know very well what I'm referring to. Your mask."

Draco locked eyes with her and deep in those silver eyes Pansy saw a boy. A boy who was scared and trapped. A boy she once knew.

He was still in there, she thought, he just needed someone to help him out. And who better than the Boy Who Lived.