I Work For One Direction..AGAIN?!

Chapter 32: Torment

Jess was sitting up and she was barley staying awake. I could only see a dark silhouette of her figure in the darkness of the room. This was the first time I had ever seen her get so drunk. I broke the girl I loved...again.

"Do you enjoy this? All this torment you put me through?" Her voice cracked. I didn't know if it was the alcohol or if it was what she was feeling at that moment.

"Jess..." I shook my head with distain.

I could hear her sniffling. "Do you just love to do this to me? Make me love you and then break me in every way possible?" Her words stung.

She thought I liked doing this. She thought I enjoyed seeing her like this. Like it was a game. Jess had no idea how hurt I was by this. She'd never know how I really felt.

I didn't know what to say. Anything I would say wouldn't help. There was one thing I could tell her that was true. One thing that would probably not make a difference. "I love you."

Her laugh dug it's way into me like a sharp knife. She didn't believe me. Why would she. All I've done was hurt her. All I ever do is hurt her and I hated myself for it. "Yeah right." She flopped onto the bed and let out a small grunt. "You don't know how to love."

Maybe she was right. Maybe I didn't know how to love. Maybe I was jut pretending that I knew. If I did love Jess than I would fight for her. But I also love the boys and I don't want to hurt them either. This was the hardest thing I had ever been through. Harder than the time when I realized Jess would never come back. She had to know. I had to tell her what was going on. She needed to know that I loved her with all my heart and that it would never be whole again unless she believed me.

"She's not my real girlfriend. Management knew about us and they made her my girlfriend. They threatened the boys and they said if I told anyone they'd know. I'm so sorry. I didn't want to lie to you or hurt you. I was protecting all of you." I finally let it out. She finally knew and now I was waiting for her to open up her arms and take me back.

It was silent. There were no words. All I heard was breathing. Heavy breathing coming from her.

"Jess?" I stepped closer to see her soundly asleep. Well.. That worked out well. I kissed her forehead and walked out of her room which was probably the last time I'd ever be in it. I closed the door quietly and made my way down the stairs.

Ring. Ring. Ring.

"Hello?" I whispered.

"Why were you just spotted with Jessette Pampa outside of a bar together?"

I sighed. Great.

"Harry!"

"She was drunk. I was just getting her home." Stupid management and those stupid eyes they have in the back of their heads.

"We talked about this..."

"Nothing happened. She was drunk. I got he up to her room and I'm leaving now." I whisper yelled.

"How are we supposed to believe you?"

"The fact that the girl I love is emotionally drinking because I broke her heart, again, isn't enough? She still hates me. I know that's what you wanted. You want her to hate me."

"Harry this isn't the time to lash out." Her voice was seriously annoying.

"You should be proud. You got me a fake girlfriend. You made me lie to my friends about her. Now everyone hates me. They don't know this is just a stupid set up played out by management. You're safe. It won't happen again." I was lashing out, just like she said.