This is basically a book where I write my feelings to the public and stuff. It's not going to be filled with anything interesting considering that I don't really get into all that drama stuff at school or at home.
Also, I will be able to answer any...
Today, was a little good, but a little bad. I've had some trouble with some people while some have been really good.
In choir, we did some practice, and honestly, we start at the same time as the band, so that means they might see us sing. And in my opinion, I think we sound horrible. And not only that, the guy that I thought I got over is one of the members in band. Not only that, we have either wear a choir shirt, or Christmas themed clothes. Me being me, I don't have a choir shirt, and the only Christmas themed clothes I have is a dress. And I HATE dresses. Why do they even have to exist!
Not only that, one of my friend's unborn sister might not make it because the umbilical cord is wrapped around the baby's neck, and her mother is late in giving birth. So I don't know what I would do in that situation, I'd probably just cry. Then some girl came in and said something VERY offensive. I don't remember what, but my friend acted out and told her "JUST DON'T, JUST DON'T TALK TO ME!" And I don't blame her, what that girl said was hurtful. The girl who offended her was acting like she was the victim in this situation saying that she did nothing wrong. Then she was saying someone's hair was uneven, and started tugging on it trying to show people. The girl that's hair was being pulled, just walked away, and the same girl said, "Guess no one cares about my opinion." Girl! STOP TRYING TO MAKE IT LOOK LIKE YOU'RE THE VICTIM HERE! YOU SAID SOMETHING OFFENSIVE, YOU COMPLAIN THAT SHE DIDN'T HAVE TO YELL! YOU START TUGGING ON SOMEONE'S HAIR TO SHOW THAT IT'S UNEVEN, AND YOU ACT LIKE YOUR OPINION DOESN'T MATTER! WELL YOU'RE CORRECT, NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR OPINION IN THIS SITUATION! JESUS!
During lunch, I got to actually TALK and ENJOY being with two friends. They didn't include me in their talk at first, but like two minutes in the conversation, they actually wanted me to join them. They shared some......private, information with me.
Then in science, one of my friend's thought something I did to their shoulder was hurtful. I had them do the same thing to me, and it felt like I was having a massage. And when I went to the edge of the room, I saw someone sitting in the food drive box, and it looked like she was a dog waiting to be taken home. Lol. SO THEN......in class we were supposed to pass a stick, that was used for a curtain, around to talk about your opinion for what disease a person we were studying about had. I had just ended my turn and I was trying to pass it to the person who was next to the person I was next to. I held it out, and all of a sudden, the girl next to me lashed out! She was like, "YOU HAVE ALL THE PEOPLE IN THE ROOM WHO WANT TO TALK, AND YET YOU PASS IT TO ME!" I just didn't say anything, and just passed it to the person next to her, the person I was trying to give it to was her, not the person next to me.
I just hate people who make assumptions, and people suffer because of it. This is why I wish I was back in Germany, with no problems, and where people actually liked me. No one lashed out at me, no one made assumptions, AND I WAS FINE WITHOUT DRAMA! I was happy at first here, but now I feel like I just want to die, like no one really wants me in this world other than my family. Actually no, the only people who ever see me and cares for me are my parents, and my uncles. Other than them, no one else cares. They act like they do, but in truth, they don't. I honestly feel like ending my life if this continues until graduation. No one needs me here, they think I'm just a waste of space.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Then on the bus, no one really talked to me. I just listened to music in complete silence. And now here I am writing this at home.
