Beauty Inside

Chapter 22

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Justin's POV

"Summer, I love you." My body instantly froze.

Holy shit. I said it. I fucking said I love you. The three words, the eight letters that I swore I would never say again, just left my mouth.

"Wait. Justin." Summer rubbed her temples. "This-this is just a lot to take in."

"I know it is. I just, I... I didn't mean to say that." I blurted.

"So you don't love me?" A frown spread a crossed Summer's face.

"No! No! That's not it! Baby, I do! It's just, I wasn't expecting for it to just slip out my mouth. Especially not this soon." I ran my fingers through my hair.

"And I defiantly wasn't expecting to hear it." Summer started to play with the ends of her hair.

"Well?" I grabbed Summer's hand from across the table, waiting, anticipating for her to return the favor.

"Well... it was really sweet of you to say that." she gave a weak smile.

"That's it? That's all you have to say?"

"Well, what else am I supposed to say? You just told me you loved me!" Summer pulled away her hand.

"Hm, I don't know? Maybe a fucking I love you too?" I stood up from the table.

"Justin, I- I, I can't." Summer dropped her head.

"This is bullshit." I said to myself, walking away from the table before things got ugly.

"Justin! Please!" Summer shouted after me. Not turning around, I simply threw up my hand, signaling her not to follow me. I walked to the front of the ship, observing the view of the ocean in front of me. Alone.

That's exactly how I felt. Alone. To put so much trust, faith, and love into someone for them to just absorb it all and not give anything back. I love Summer. I knew I did ever since the day I pleaded for her back. I was just too scared to admit it. And now that I did, there was just a small hope in me that she was feeling the exact same way. I know that I shouldn't be mad because I can't force anyone to feel the way I want them too. I'm just scared that... I won't be enough. Summer isn't the one to care about the money or the fame. If there isn't love, what's there to keep her around?

"Justin?" I heard a faint voice behind me. I didn't move.

"Justin, I'm sorry. I-"

"Just save it. No need to waste your breathe when I already know how

"Look, I know that it took a lot for you to say that, and I should've said it back, but... but I just couldn't. Not yet. Justin, I don't know what love is! All of this, the kissing, the cuddling, the fact of actually having someone care! It's all new to me! I've never been in love and I just want to be careful with my first. This doesn't mean I will ne-" turning around, I grabbed her waist, connecting our lips together silencing her.

"I'm sorry." I rested my head against hers. "You have nothing to apologize for. I'm stupid to get mad over it. If you aren't ready, then you just aren't ready. There's nothing I can do to change that. And I don't want to force it either. Okay?"

"So you're not mad at me anymore?" she asked.

"I was never mad at you. I was mad at myself if anything."Summer nodded her head in understanding.

"And I'm not mad about Stacy. Yeah, I think she's a bitch, and I would shove my foot so far up her ass if I could, but, I know that she's a part of your past. I have to just learn to accept that."