dancat

My Boyfriend's a Vampire

Why does Dan love his boyfriend so much to go through such torture? It's been about four months since he outed himself as a vampire and to his boyfriend. Albeit he'd prefer to do it when he didn't accidentally try to suck him dry, but Stampy was very forgiving and understanding when it came to his vamperism.

Speaking of vampirism, be a vampire really sucks. The pun may or may not be intended. He can eat normal food but he doesn't get his fill from it, only blood. He can't go in the sun for long or else he'll pass out and get a couple burns on his body, but that's about it. No turning into ashes which is a relief. His eyes are still red but he just puts on colored contact lenses to conceal them. He's gotten used to his powers now, but they still get activated in the most unconventional times. And the absolute worst part about being a vampire is controlling his bloodlust.

Think of this particular part of being a vampire as a blood boner. Picture the following scenario. Dan is out and having a grand time with his boyfriend when he suddenly goes stiff and his canines start to grow and he starts staring at people's neck and starts to act like an animal. It just happens randomly and it just blows. But he takes care of this nicely since Stampy is nice enough to let him bite him whenever this happens. But since they're busy most of the time, he usually goes out at night and sucks some poor guys blood since he doesn't need that much sleep like he used to. Usually, he just hunts for some bad guys who are beating people up and illegal people who happen to be doing illegal things. Although, people who do meth and cocaine did not taste that good. Except for people who do weed. But he'll never tell Stampy that.

Back to the torture at hand, Dan has recently discovered he can finally turn into a bat so he can be more sneaky. He decides to show Stampy and, oh boy, did this lead into a fucking disaster. Stampy recently installed a doggy door for his dog and cat so they can come in or out. This also works for Dan since vampires need legit permission in order to come inside someone's house. So when he surprised his boyfriend with his new look, Stampy immediately grabbed him and made him play dress up. Currently, he has on a little bat suit, bowtie and top hat included.

"Stamps, stop, please, I beg of you."

"Awe, but you look so cute like this though." Dan takes off his little suit and flies to the window to yeet it outside. "Wait! Why did you do that?"

"Because I can and it was getting stuffy in there. I have litteral fur now and it got very hot and stuffy in there."

"Well if you're so tired of this, then why don't you just turn back?" Dan looks as if he would reply before looking away sheepishly. "You don't know how to turn back, do you?"

"Okay, so, like, I literally turned into a bat and came here. I was excited and I didn't think about turning back. You know how I don't think things through."

Stampy sighs and picks up Dan by the scruff of his neck. "And you had to come right when I was about to go to sleep to." He mumbles.

"I can sleep, I just don't need to do it as much anymore."

"Well I'm not that tired anymore... You don't mind watching me play games do you?"

"Not at all."

Stampy puts Dan on his shoulder and walks to his office only to turn on his console and play a game he recently downloaded. "What's this game?" Dan asked as he made his way to his boyfriend's stomach to curl into a little ball.

"It's called Ori and the blind forest. I wanted to make a let's play of it but I've played it a lot already and it's pretty old. I might make a let's play of the sequel when it comes out, and if the fans ask for the first game, then i guess I'll play it. But it'll be more a walkthrough if anything to be honest." Dan hums in approval and watched Stampy play his game while he just relaxes on his stomach. "Hey, Dan?"

"Hm?"

"How did you turn into a vampire?"

Stampy feels Dan stiffen up. He almost would've laughed if this wasn't a serious question. Stampy has always wanted to know how he became a vampire since he knows you don't become a vampire just by being bitten. He's also peiced together that vamperism is more of an STD that just a bite, but that's just his theory. Also, Dan doesn't like talking about it general. He couldn't blame him though, what's his business is his business. And if he didn't feel like talking about this now, then that's fine by him. There's a moment of silent afterwards and Stampy sighs. He knew this would happen again, but he's fine, but he was caught offgaurd when Dan began to speak.

"I was in New York when it happened. The show had finished and I... I needed to go back to the hotel so I can get off. The hotel was also pretty close to the place I was doing my show so I decided to walk back. On the way I met this lady who... um... was providing her services for free. I was desperate at that point and pheromones were clouding my thoughts so I took her back to the hotel. Then we... um... erm..."

"You made out, had sex, and she bit you, and when you woke up in the morning you realized you were a vampire?"

"...Yeah. All that." It was quiet again after that. He thought maybe he sounded a bit cruel when he finished Dan's sentence like that, and Stampy vaugly heard Dan say, "... Don't hate me."

"I'm sorry. That was rude of me. And Dan, I don't hate you. That was one time, so as long as you don't do that again, you'll be fine."

"Thanks, Stamps... I love you."

Stampy pet Dan on his head with two of his fingers. "I know... and I love you, too."