left for sorrow (Shawn Mendes)

10

I lay on my back staring at the baby blue sky as the sun beams "it's been a week since you've had that vivid nightmare" Lucy begins talking, her voice smooth,and soft "how have you been feeling since it happened?" her voice sounds delicate and almost causious

I think of a response "worse.. It felt so real i'm paranoid even more now. I know he hasn't stopped looking for me" I hear scribbling sounds

"Emma.. how do you know he's after you? what makes you think such thing?" she asks, and the memory floods in like it happened yesterday.

"I-I... because"I say closing my eyes, and taking a deep breath I need to open up I need to vent to someone I need some sort of help"-before he got my sister" i stop myself from talking unsure if im ready to talk about this. i look down at my hands and as if my body is pleading me to open up my mouth opens without control and the words come out "I-I couldnt stop him" I cant bring myself to say more. my body shaking at the flashbacks im having of that night i'll never forget

"Why didn't you stop him?"

"He knocked me out- he must've because everything went pitchblack within seconds" I tell her remembering everything, my heart beating faster my palms getting sweaty my anxiety slowly building up the memories keep flooding as if im going through it again.

"emma" lucys concerned but soft voice makes me look up at her as i clench my hands into a fist while i try to catch some air. "Could it be that all of this youre going through all the nightmares are just because you feel guilty.It could be that sofias death impacted you so much its just all in your head"the sound of my sisters name makes me flinch i havent heard it in so long i feel the tears threatening to come down

"It did impact me. but it's not that, its the fact that he's-he's still out there is a constant reminder that he can be plotting who to take next and there is a possibility i can be next" I tell her shifting in my now uncomfortable seat the room walls seem to be coming closer and closer i roll up my sleeves feeling the sweat dripping from my back slowly building on my forhead and i try to control my breathing but i cant I havent talked about sofia since she died

"The possibility is very slim." lucy begins to say putting the pen down interlocking her fingers together her stare making me want to break eye contact with her " Studies have shown that predators don't try aiming towards someone or anything related to one of their past victims because its way to risky.... in other words emma you're safe"

"No.. no I am not." I say shaking my head she doesnt get it. she's not trying to "I'm not crazy" i mutter a tear escaping but i wipe it away.this is why i don't try to tell anyone because i know they'll try to give me reasons as to why i shouldn't worry but thats not what i want. what i need is for someone to listen to me without looking at me as if im crazy someone who wont shove pills down my throat to not deal with me someone who will talk to me instead of telling me it was just a dream.I hear her sigh,and scribble something down "can you tell me at least something that has happened for the good ever since you came here?"

"Nothing" I say my voice cracking my eyes focusing on the glass ceiling. I stare at the sky as if i'm being hypnotized. I hear the sound of a car door being closed, and I sit up on the couch to see Lucy looking out the window.

"He's here" she says placing my file in a cabinet and closing it then walking out. I look at the cabinet, and cant help but wonder if all the other files are in there like Luke's and Blaine's.I get up, and walk towards it. I look out the window to see Lucy greeting a man around her age. She shakes his hand,and then leads him to the front door. I avoid their sight as I try to open the cabinet but it is locked.crap. I turn around to see a shadow pass by quickly. I run out the room trying to see who it was.