left for sorrow (Shawn Mendes)

13

Its been a month. It is currently July first.It has been two weeks since the whole Blaine accident and things are now back to normal for everyone around me.Ive continued drinking my pills and have nightmares but less frightning by now im used to them I still get little sleep so luke stays up with me. I feel bad because i can see how tired he gets so i force him to go to sleep half the time.everything has been peaceful it's scary but at the same time it's the break I have needed for so long.I hope it stays this way.Luke, and I have really gotten to know each other in many different ways and levels.it's amazing and I will admit I am crushing hard on him,and as for Barbara she hasn't come back ,and it's understandable she lost her baby.I really like Ben.he is so chill,and sweet so that's good I guess.Everything in the house has also been going well.We wake up early in the morning, eat breakfast and then do our chores.We then we relax until lunch time where we eat lunch,and then we go to our therapy session if it's that time of the week. If it's not we have three hours to watch tv only,and after that lucy,and Ben usually have an activity for us to help us with anxiety and all and then when night time hits we have a bonfire & we talk to each other about our feelings with everyone.

"You done?" I look at my door to see Luke wearing his surfing outfit.i smile as I place my laundry basket on the floor.

"I am"

"Good now put your bathing suit on" he smirks

"For what huh?"I say with a cheesy smile.I can't help it.

"I'm gonna teach you how to surf"

I burst out into laughter "I don't even know how to swim"

"I'll teach you cmon lets have some fun"he says coming up to me.He stops when he's inches away,and I can't help but get nervous.

"H-have fun?" I repeat like a dumbass.

"Yeah.Let's have fun together emma'" my name perfectly rolls out his mouth making my heart leap. Oh god I have a crush.

"O-okay" I say stepping back only to trip on the laundry basket. He quickly grabs my hand pulling me against him.I nervously giggle "i'm- i'm gonna go change n-"

"Oh yeah of course i'll uh go now yeah" he shifts uncomfortably and i nod

"Yeah"I say as we stare at each other.

"Oh sorry" he says realizing he's still here.I giggle as he walks out, and I close the door and I sigh. Oh god he's freaking cute.It hurts but I know this will end at the end of summer that's the sad part.I brush the negative thought apart. I'm here to be positive I tell myself as I pick a bathing suit chloe gave me a couple days ago and i put it on,and then put my shorts,and tank top back on. I slip my sandals on,and tie my brown wavy hair up.I look at my shoulder to see the burnt,and peeling skin and cringe ive never been out in the sun as much as i been here but im enjoying it its refreshing. The weather is so hot out here especially since I spend my days out in the beach with everyone.I walk out my room to see sam walk out the bathroom

"Chloe is looking for you"I tell him remembering she was looking for him

"You hit it once,and they think they own you" he says making me giggle.

"Ohhhh i'm telling Lucy"I joke pushing his shoulder.

"Don't make me throw you down the stairs" he says in a familiar smooth female voice

"Which one was that?" I ask no longer confused or weirded out im just intrigued everytime i hear him change his voice because its actually fun trying to guess who hes imitating we usually make bets to see whos right its become a norm

"Taylor swift" he says smiling.

"Ohhh,I see it now.Maybe you should work on doing the drake one"I tell him walking down the stairs.

"Where are you going?" Ben asks coming out of nowhere startling me a bit but i brush it aside

"Oh the beach with Luke. We will be back in like an hour."

"Okay be careful,and remember we are going downtown in two hours."he says with a smile the same teeth showing smile he has it never changes to a smirk or anything its always the same

"I got it."I say walking out the porch, and to the back of the house where I can see Luke already in the water sitting on his surf board looking sexier than ever.I make my way down the grass hill that turns into sand as i reach the beach

"How can you do this?" i say once I stand close enough so he can hear me.He looks back,and smiles and begins to paddle my way.

"Do what?"

"Risk your life so much while doing this"

"It kind of runs in the family" he says squinting his eyes the sun hitting him.

"Alright well as long as I don't die"I say taking my shirt off then pulling my pants down.I look up to see his eyes glued on me making me feel insecure in many ways because compared to me hes a model.

He notices I caught him looking,and clears his throat"alright so hop in the water first" I look at the light blue water,and take in a deep breath because I haven't been in the ocean since sofia died theres actually a lot of stuff i havent done since she died mostly because they all remind me of her but it's time to break these chains holding me back.i dip my feet in the warm water,and then my other one.

"See? not hard" Luke says making me giggle.I begin to walk towards him the water rising with every step.When I finally reach him the water reaches to my waist.

"What about the sharks?"I ask.

"They're gonna have to go through me first" he tries reasurring me but fails and we burst into laughter. I cant help but stare at his pink full lips as he laughs God, I wanna kiss him so bad it's killing me.I haven't felt this craving this amazing feeling in so long actually i've never felt this way towards a guy.

"Fair enough"I joke 

"Wait you actually don't know how to swim?" he asks.

"Eh not really. I know how to do the puppy swim but I like stay in the same spot"I giggle nervously because im not joking.

He chuckles showing his cute dimple,and perfect white teeth.he is perfect I swear. Why is he here?this place is for people with issues.he doesn't have issues " that's fine i'll show you the basics of surfing,and if you fall of the board.I will be here to save you"

"Okay let's do this"I say.he gets of his board,and begins talking,and teaching me but the whole time I have an internal war because I can't stop staring at his beauty, and lips.