The Lost Boy

Chapter 17

*Peter's POV*

Shortly after Kendall left the tent Rumple transported himself here, so he could tell me about his findings. At first I was overjoyed he found something, but that all changed once he began to explain it.

"I have some news for you father." Rumple said plainly.

"What is it?" I questioned.

"In order for you to continue life in Storybrooke at your current age, this goes for you, Kendall, and the boys. You will have to eliminate your shadow."

"Well, I know that, but I haven't exactly found a way to go about it yet." I interrupted

"If you would just let me finish speaking, then you could see that I figured out a way for you to end your shadow. Now, the way to finally defeat your shadow isn't by your powers. Kendall will have to get rid of it because only hers is strong enough. It purified your heart, which means they are powerful enough to destroy your shadow." Rumple finished

"What?! I can't make Kendall do that! Do you remember the last time she used her powers, she nearly died! No way can that happen!" I exclaimed

"Looks like you won't be leaving Neverland anytime soon. That is the only way, but when you are ready to leave the island for good I came up with a potion you can drink to continue your life at the age you are currently."

With that Rumple just left me in complete silence. Kendall isn't experienced in her magic and the one time she has used it she came very close to death. I don't want to risk that and I don't want to risk her. Is it selfish that I don't want to give her up, well it depends how you look at it. If I think of it as I can't lose her because Addy and the boys then it doesn't seem so bad. However the other way is not want to help her with her powers because when the time comes something could back fire and I could lose her. That seems a little more selfish. Is it so wrong to want to keep something that makes you happy and gives your life a purpose.

Outside my tent I could hear some of the boys using a super whiny tone of voice. I peeked through a little crack and noticed the boy's lack of bread. Using my hand I placed it on the other side of the fabric and snapped my fingers. More bread appeared, so I could go back to stressing about something more important.

"Ahh, I don't know what to do or which way to go." I said under my breath in an angry sort of tone. My legs took me back and forth as that was just normally what I do when stressed. Suddenly hands clamped to the sides of my head, I went to scream but failed to let out even a squeak. Feeling the warmth that my face heated up with, vision become blurred, and what felt like a 100 lb. weight press up against my chest I fell back onto my bed and just cried. All I could do was sit in silence.

You know when you just lock yourself away and just cry because you don't want anyone to hear you. People will realize you're not okay and ask "Hey what's wrong?," but you play it all off like everything's fine since it's easier then explaining why you feel the way you do. I say that all the time to everyone I feel bad especially lying to Kendall, but I don't know how to express or convey my emotions. How do you tell someone you want to live, yet everything around you is saying give up be done. Just end it, it's all too difficult. I always want to jump to the easier loop hole because I am Peter Pan, however, the easiest way out isn't the best.

Shortly after I fixed the bread supply Kendall walked in through the tent entrance and I could feel her eyes beaming down at me in such curiosity. By this time most of my tears had dried up leaving me rolling back and forth as if imitating a very young frightened child searching for the comfort of their parents or someone they love and trust.

*Kendall's POV*

"Hey Peter is everything alright?"

"Yeah everything's fine." He replied voice jaw clenched.