Bring It Back [DISCONTINUED]

THIRTY FIVE

"She doesn't know."

All eyes were turned to me. I gulped and sat there frozen. I immediately put my head down, avoiding their shocked looks. It suddenly felt cold when awkward silence came in. The only sound was the fire crackling and some crickets around the area. I was tapping my shaky fingers on my bottle of beer and bouncing my leg. 

I may have not show it but I was really taken back. My heart is pounding hard against my chest right now. I could hear it, could they hear it too? I hope not. It'll make the moment worse.

But, Jim. My guy best friend since primary school, the guy I treated like a brother, one of the most trusted persons I have, my co-kidnapper... he has feelings for me. All these years, everyone knew and then there's me, dumbfounded of all the things that happened. Now I finally understood all the squad's teasing, their jokes, and their very obvious lies back then.

I took a drink from my beer. I was having cold sweat already even with the chilly air.

"I'm going to the bathroom." Blindfolded Shawn says in the middle of the awkwardness tension. I noticed he tied that blindfold on himself. He stands up and carefully places the guitar against the log he was sitting.

"I'll guide you." I put my beer down and quickly walked to Shawn. I grabbed his arm and rushed inside the house. We went inside the men's bathroom (yes, including me) that looks like the one in malls except this bathroom has lesser urinals.

I untied Shawn's blindfold, he said thanks then rushed to one of the urinals to take a pee. But he looks at me first with a confused look, maybe because I'm here with him in the bathroom.

"Don't mind me and I won't mind you." I sat on the sink, thinking deep again while Shawn does his business.

I removed my mask to finally take a breathe in. I kept remembering those times our friends teased us. Like that one time when they forced us to sit next to each other on a ride, only to be made fun of after. When they made jokes about us being so sweet with each other when I just gave Jim a piece of paper.

Shawn brought me back to reality when he was washing his hands beside me. I let out a sigh and he looks at me.

"Are you ok?" He asks, concern in his tone.

"No." I snapped. 

Shawn sits beside me. "Your anger issues are showing a lot recently. Calm down, Cathy." He voice was so soft, it was quite soothing.

I slumped my shoulders. "You know how much I hated secrets, right?" Shawn nodded.

"Yeah, and yet you're hiding a massive one. Ha, the irony." I gave him a side glare. He clears his throat, "I'm sorry."

"I hate secrets because it destroys relationships."

"I see where you're getting, Cathy. What happened between you and your dad started all of it." I nodded this time.

"Correct, and right now there's a new issue. Shawn, you did hear what we were talking about earlier, didn't you?" He nodded. "What would you do if you're in my shoes?" I asked.

He looked at me for a second. "What would you do first of all, Cathy? What's inside of your head?"

I chewed on my lip, thinking of an answer. "Well... I-I, maybe I'll talk to Jim. Say that, I don't know, let's stay like this. Focus on the mission and other stuff. It's just that I don't know what it's like to be him, having a crush and it's accidentally spilled."

Shawn listened intently. "Good answer. I would do the same, I'll talk to them too."

"But what about the squad? I think it'll all be awkwardness for the rest of the mission." I nervously said.

"Talk to them too. But maybe it's good if they will be the one who will approach. I mean you're the one who's been surprised, right? Just keep the communication, you guys are all close to each other."

Shawn's a really great advice and comfort giver. Those are two traits I liked about him.

"Shall we go now? We've been here for 10 minutes already, I think." Shawn stands up and I hopped down the sink.

"Don't forget your mask," Shawn turns to me and was about to put my mask on. "but smile first." He tells me with his annoying smile. I raised an eyebrow at him. "Come on, it will make you feel better." Shawn adds.

I put on a forced lousy smile. Shawn puts his pointer fingers on the corner of my lips and expands my smile. "There, better." He laughs. I laughed as well.

Shawn then lifts the mask to my mouth. "And the blindfold." He turns around and I tie it around his head. Before we left the bathroom, I gave him a quick hug and said "Thank you."

We exited the bathroom and I guide him back outside. I sat with the squad again, hoping this tension of uneasiness will die sooner.