loki's pov
i lean with my back against the wall looking up. today was one of the horrible days were i had the misfortune to walk down this hall at the wrong time. just in time to hear james barnes crying. it hurt to hear him cry in pain, after falling in love i find myself caring for others more like i have seen light of a better way. but i shear a small connection and understanding with james. i don't like to talk about it.
i will strip you of your power, hurt you worse than ever and sew your mouth shut! the silver tongued god of mischief won't talk his way out of this one !
i reached my hand up to my lips, you can really see the scars anymore. but i can still feel it. i can always feel it.
to my displeasure and shear unluckiness this day i also somehow found myself getting lost in thought long enough to hear the captain crying. it made my heart drop listening to him. i couldn't listen anymore so i pushed off the wall and started to leave. but not fast enough not to hear "every day natasha, everyday i hear him cry."
everyday?
i ran i don't know why but i did. that's a lie. i know why. i just chose to assume i dont cuz i don't want to know why i ran because. i don't. i just don't want to know.
i somehow found my way to tony's lab. it was just down the stairs now. i couldn't not remember now i was crying, it all came flooding back to fast, i tried to run from it but i can't run from myself, but i can try, it made sense in my head, so i ran full pelt down the stairs, crying so hard i couldn't see. i heard the buzz if the lab door opening i ran into someone and we both fell to the floor.
i was going to get up and stay sorry when their arms wrapped around me holding me close as i cried, they began to softly talk in a voice i recognised as anthony's "shhh love its okay. i've got you. im not going anywhere loki. i love you"
"i love you to" i sobbed out.
i would be embarrassed at the idea of me a god crying, in public nonetheless, but i was too upset to car, so i stayed in anthony's arms for a long time, till i calmed down. 2 hours later.
"sorry" i mumbled as we got up
" it's fine dear, what got you so upset tho, you only get like that when... what happened to get you upset?" he asked trying to be light.
"i heard james crying again, but it was really bad. i want to look at the security footage though. we cant keep ignoring this problem and expect it to go away. That's NOT how it works anthony!" i sighed "you know that better that anyone... we both do. james needs help."
"no" he replied sternly
"look i get it it's his privacy but-"
"he doesn't care, he helped me put the cameras in, i don't want you getting upset. " he said sadly
"then watch it with me" i replied placing my hands on my hips.
we started each other down for a good 3 minutes
he grunted knowing i was too hard headed to drop this easily, he nodded. he grabbed his stark ipad and brought up the footage.
we went back a bit so just before he woke up, he was yelling in his sleep.
{video recording went as follows}
james was thrashing around harshly in his sleep as if being torchered. his hands shot up to his head and he started screaming.
"don't take him.please don't hurt him. i. i love him. NO NO I'M SORRY! PLEASE NO. no no no. NO YOU CANT!. YOU CANT MAKE ME HURT HIM PLEASE! i beg you"
he shot up, and was sliend for a second before he burst into tears, he hugged his knees and began to sob. gut wrenching sobbes of pain and loss. the kind of crying that is so emotional heart breaking you wouldn't think it was possibly real. yet it was. and it was being watched.
"new mission: kill captain America" a voice said in a deadly dark voice that was definitely not james
"no please don't hurt him, DONT PLEASE DONT! I'LL BE GOOD PLEASE DON'T HURT HIM!" that was james. this voice actually had emotion, and it was terrified
{end of camera footage}
"um, that was a lot." i said sadly.
"um, excuse me what the fuck? yeah it was sad, but are we gonna ignore the fact someone who DEFINITELY WASN'T bucky spoke in that video?" tony said making crazy gestures with his hands.
"what do you mean?" i asked, thats it hes gone mad. i thought looking at my boyfriend, as he messed with the tablet.
"listen" he wispered
"new mission:kill captain America"
tony paused the video "that wasn't bucky"
he played the video again
"no please don't hurt him"
he paused the video, pointing at the screen "that was bucky"
"JARVIS, voice recadnishon for everyone in this video" anthony yelled at his ai
"of course sir" the robotic voice replied "two voices found. James Buchanan Barnes, and the winter soldier"
"um, jay thats the same person by two names" tony said
"no, he's right, that's two different people, the soldier would be the completely different person now that bucky remembers things. we have evidence of this. when the words are said he becomes the soldier. saying they are the same is like saying that bruce and the hulk are the same person, or dr jekyll and mr hyde are the same person" i said
"sir mr laufeyson is correct. the soldier seems to talk, maybe torment bucky. " JARVIS spoke
"we can't act like this isnt going on anymore" i said
"fine. but not tonight, thor's coming for the party, and i don't want bucky to not go, he has fun still even though this is going on, he's strong. i think he's as strong as he is because he can laugh. i know he's looking forwards to tonight, he helped me plan it. so he will be happy. we have no right to take that away from him"
"your right"
YOU ARE READING
you're not him anymore {stucky}
Fanfiction[3 months since bucky was found] steve and bucky begin to fall fatally attracted, but bucky can't let steve close. because the soldier has a gun to his head, and all he can do is keep a straight face, and close his eyes au were steve took bucky back...
