Bloodshot Symphony • [mitch rapp]

chapter seven

Lydia's pov

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I felt the tobacco smell diverging around the room.
I think I have fallen asleep, or was it all just a one huge dream?
My body's hurting me.
I feel like every single inch of it, starts to call at loud for my help and some care.
I was staring at my left side, straightly on the creamy carpet. In silence. Swallowing, unsure with my own thoughts which somehow..somehow slowly were trying to spill out and fill up my mind again.

What have you done, Lydia?

This is crazy.

I think I myself am not able to process it just yet.

My tiny left hand has raised a bit, moving closer to my lips, touching the bottom lip of it. The increasing tobacco smell, has been hitting into my nostrils, more effectively. Forcing me, to calmly turn my head into the direction in which was lying my potential problem.
I've slowly raised my sight higher, at his body profile, spotting the half burnt cigarette placed in between his dry lips. Few of his dark longer wisps, covering his forehead. Extending with their length towards his eyelids. My heart has beaten harder, making myself to react at the stare which I was keeping for him, at this very moment. I could spot the shape of his right knee, discovering its shape from under the sheets material, in the lazily sit which he was taking.
It made me swallow difficulty.

Oh, my god. I literally feel..so ashamed with myself. And..and, at the same time I..

- "You staring." - He rasped out suddenly, at the same time throwing out the smoke from his mouth, placing the cigarette between middle and index fingers of his left hand. Honestly, I can't even react properly. I just..I don't know. I feel awkward. Completely awkward. It feels like, I'm not myself anymore. I shook lightly my head with a swallow, smiling stupiditly to myself, like a brat. Left tiny hand of mine, made sure to pull higher the pink sheets material, covering more of my visible cleavage, which accentuates my breasts. My right hand instead, went directly to my hair, trying to fix this mess which has been created there. Suddenly even the coldness of my necklace is burning my skin, as never.

Oh my god, his cock was inside of me.

This sudden thought which has throwed itself on my mind, made me immediately hit the hand on the sheets, closely to my breasts, as making sure that it was well covered. I can still feel him inside, and this is the distracting thought. Right now my folds just clenching, with the feeling of emptiness. Without the feeling of his fill in. It feels painful not only because he was rough, but also because..I think I even liked it.
And my little one feels empty.
I raised my sight slowly higher, spotting just now his glimpse at me. I could admit that right corner of his lips exposes a slight smirk, of..of what? Satisfaction? Proudness?
Why do I always look for negative things here? It might be just a positive sign. Or, maybe he just laughs in his thoughts at me that I gave myself so easily to him.