The horizon and the balcony

Brown paper packages tied up with string

November 17th
"You seem to be in the spirit"Angelica mused as she bustled into the house. Her behavior was getting worrisome, this was beyond her usual busy body activities. Lafayette was stretched across the couch with a blanket wrapped around them, warm apple cider in hand. The spontaneous stretch of warm weather had came and gone, it was time for winter coats and scarves. The record player in the corner of the room was cranking out soft jazz music. They hadn't taken the time to look at the artist but immediately fell in love when a jazzy rendition of my favorite things played.

"I'm always in the spirit this time of year, fall in New York is beautiful"They said.

"It truly is...Lafayette-"she started but they held a hand up. She was not going to ruin their false sense of peace by bring back reality.

"Not now Ange...please"They said. She sighed and nodded taking a seat on the couch.

"I just want you to know that you're not being a burden, Amelia and I love you here but I...I know you miss them"she continued. Lafayette wanted to argue but they had no right, this wasn't their house to act reckless in.

"I may miss them but they certainly do not miss me...they would've called. It's been two months Ange, I think it's over..."They said defeatedly. They removed their engagement ring a while ago keeping it in a jewelry box. It was so beautiful but it didn't hold the same meaning anymore, it was just an object.

"You'll never know until you try and you'll have to face them eventually..."she said.

"Yeah yeah I know-"

"No Lafayette I mean soon. Eliza invited us to her son's Adoption party which is next month...John,Alexander and Hercules will be attending"she said. Lafayette froze.

"Do we...do I have to go?"They asked carefully.

"Yes you have to go. Eliza's been dying to meet you for the longest time, wants to talk therapy stuff with you."she said.

Lafayette nodded.

"I don't think John meant what he said, he's not that cold-"

"You damned him to hell Angelica, what's with the sudden turn around?"They snapped. When Angelica stared in response they took a deep breath and uttered and apology.

"This...this is why"she said holding up her phone. A picture of John tickling a little boy in dinosaur pajamas was on the screen. It was definitely candid, John was doing that big smile. It was goofy and made his face rosy from the sheer force of it. The little boy was mid laugh and had his eyes squeezed shut.

I think somebody will make a great uncle
The text underneath read. The domesticity of the photo turned them on their head.

"That's not the John I know..."They said.
Angelica took that as means to go on.

"Exactly that's not-"

"No. The John I know hates children, he wouldn't be caught dead in Harlem. He had a panic attack last time as drove through Harlem"They said quietly.

"Honey I think John is doing a bit of growing up, which honestly I think you should too"She said.

"Me?! I was the victim in this-"

"That's exactly it Laf! You're seeing the scenario in black and white instead of shades of grey! There is no one victim in this shit! You're all the fucking victims and you all hurt each other someway somehow dammit!"She snapped.

"I don't have to sit here and take this"Lafayette said standing up.

"Oh but you do cause you're in my house, sit your ass back down!"she growled sending them flying back to their seat. They sent her a glare and ignored the fear racing through their chest. Angelica Schuyler was a force to be reckoned with happy but angry...she was insufferable.

"I need you to make things right Lafayette, they love you"She said softly.

They sighed and leaned back against the couch.

"How would you know if they di-do?"They asked. Angelica held up a brown paper package tied together with twine. It had a yellow tag on the side of it.

"This arrived this morning, check who it's from"she said handing it to them. They held it firmly in their hands. Without checking the tag they knew who it was from, the only one who wrapped like he was running out of time.

"It's from Alexander"They said softly.

"How do you know? You didn't read the tag"she said.

"I've lived with Alexander for a long time mon cher, this has nothing on how they wrap Christmas presents"they said. They were Jewish of course but they still put up with the boys festivities and grew to enjoy them.

"Open it! I'm really curious now"Angelica said sitting on her heels. Lafayette chuckled as she peeked over their shoulder.

They neatly undid the twine and tried to open the paper to the best of their ability.

"Oh just rip it!"Angelica exclaimed. Lafayette did so and cringed the entire time at the 'waste of perfectly good paper'. Angelica rolled her eyes and looked over again.

"That's what he got you?"she said slowly.

Lafayette nodded and began reading the stapled sheets of paper.

Love is love is love is love that's all I can say when I think of you. You render me speechless, completely incoherent, incompetent even. I remember I would freestyle for you in Central Park, trip over my words just to make you laugh but alas Laf I'm getting too god damn old to do that anymore. I remember when we met you said you loved poetry and I told you I was a poet. I lied just a little bit to win over your affectionate, I'm just a man who sometimes knows which words go where and how to rhyme, reading Dr.Suess as a child used to be my favorite pastime. That was corny I can admit it, but I bet it made you smile. I wish I could see that dopey look on your face, that smile where your eyes crinkle at the side and your teeth are fully on display. That smile that makes me think 'gah damn this baddie is mine' I hope I'm using that term correctly, I'm not exactly hip as the kids say but I do try. I try to keep up with the times mainly for you, just as our nation you're ever changing, always improving, making mistakes and trying not to make the same ones over again. I hope this wasn't a mistake, it's four in the morning and I haven't gone to sleep. I long for your embrace, how you would gently cup my face and bring me back to bed letting me rest my head on your chest. I haven't been sleeping fine, John is cold and Hercules is like hades a thousand degrees all the time. I bet you liked that little reference, a little Greek mythology for you. I should probably end this, it's turning into the odyssey it seems. Please don't be like Odysseus, come back to Ithaca to see your Penelope. I know this doesn't rhyme but the sun is coming up and I'm running out of time.
Love is love is love is love

"Oh Lafayette...that was beautiful"Angelica whispered. Lafayette merely nodded and held the letter close to their chest.

"That is my Alexander, always the charmer"They whispered back. It's like they were sharing a forbidden secret.

"If you'll excuse me I have a phone call to make"They said and took off towards the guest room. Angelica smiled proudly and took their apple cider into her own hands finishing it.

Lafayette sat down on the bed and left the phone on speaker.

One ring..two rings...three rings....four ri-

"Hello?"The voice was clear as day. Lafayette's voice got caught in their throat for a few seconds before they could speak.

"Alexander"They breathed.