I hate these bastards, with their bloody twat-tronic gearboxes.
Audis seem to be the dick head's car of choice at the moment.
There's a guy who lives near me who's about as close to the definition of "Dick head" as you can get, and he recently replaced his Ford Escort GTi with an Audi A4. I guess the Audi's probably faster, but... It's dull and I hate it.
It's the product placement that pisses me off most though... Usually Audi's are just another fucking boring car on the road, but in films, all that's all different.
In films, if someone happens to be driving an Audi, they're gonna be fine. No matter how recklessly they drive... eg jumping an Audi onto a boat, like in taken... Or how helpless they are... eg that bit in iron man where a bad guy picks up an Audi Q7, and iron man grabs it and puts it down gently, like he actually gives a shit when he needs to save the world.
It's not even their invincibility so much that gets me... It's also that they're fucking everywhere. In films... everyone who isn't a bad guy drives an Audi...? Just FUCK OFF, Audi!
And... Jesus, have they ever heard of styling?
Why do all their cars look the same?
And why do they all look so fucking dull?
I guess that could be an advantage in a way... dull and anonymous is useful if you're up to no good, or if you're a cop. Basically the same thing.
Audi? Are you reading this??? If you are, get your shit together and make a car that doesn't need product placement to get my attention!
YOU ARE READING
Car Madness
Non-FictionMy opinions on cars. Might be a bit of a rant book... I'm gonna be rambling about new cars and old, and the people who drive them. I'm British by the way, so I'm focused on cars here in eggland. Although I am a big fan of American muscle cars... And...
