Averse Love || Hayes Grier

Chapter 2

I slowly turned around to see Hayes lying next to me. Slightly panicking, I got up and walked back towards the yard. Turning around, I see him taking a few steps towards me. Scared, I start to run back towards the house.

"Wait!" he screams, "I want to talk to you!" he says running towards me.

I turn back to look at him and in the process, trip on a random stick. Bracing for the impact of the hard ground, I push my arms in front of my body. Waiting to hit the dirt, I feel two arms wrap around my waist pulling me up. I'm turned around to see Hayes, his face just inches from my own.

"Please don't hurt me." I whimper out. "Please." I whisper.

"Hey, I'm not going to hurt you." Hayes breathes out softy, lightly cupping my face.

My instant reaction is to flinch away from his touch. I feel Hayes lightly set me down, still holding my arms. I start to hyperventilate. I have no idea what he's doing and I sure as hell don't want to find out.

"Sshh, Calm down. It's okay" he whispers softly, bringing my body towards himself.

Surprisingly, I begin to calm down. To be honest, I have no idea what's going on. I rarely go within two feet of someone, let alone have them cradle me in their arms.

"Why are you so scared?" Hayes asks.

"I-I, I can't." I stutter pulling myself from his grasp.

I quickly run into the house, going straight to my room. Seeing how my room isn't fully finished, there was no way I could calm down there. I open up the balcony doors, stepping out into the humid summer air. Looking into the yard, I see Hayes sitting there in confusion. Staring at him, I take in his features. His deep chestnut hair hangs in his face as he concentrates in thought. Those ocean blue eyes sparkling in the late-day sun. His gray t-shirt lightly crumpled, probably from holding me. Muscular arms hold up his head while he sits in the grass. Long tanned legs stretched out in front of him. All of a sudden, he brings his head up, making eye contact. For some reason, I keep that contact. I don't shy away, or run. I look straight into his eyes, even from yards away.

"Hi." Hayes says, slightly smiling. "Come talk to me?"

Too shy to speak, I lightly nod my head. Making my way back downstairs, I think to myself. Why am I doing this? I never look at people, intentionally making conversation with them was unheard of for me. It's always been hard for me, but it's not entirely my fault.

Before I know it, I'm back outside. Stopping a few feet from the tall boy, I look up.

"You, um, wanted to talk?" I blurt out nervously.

"Yeah, if that's okay?" Hayes responds uncertainly.

"Well I guess...."

"So I never caught your name."

I honestly had no idea how I was doing this. I always stayed away from people, not wanting to get close. If you don't build a relationship, you can't get hurt. But Hayes was different. I don't know what it was, but I was comfortable around him.

"Oh, uh it's Shanley." I finally responded.

"That's a beautiful name." he says smiling.

"Thanks, Hayes is pretty unique too." I said laughing.

"It is, but you want to know a secret?" he laughs, sitting down.

"Sure." I say, sitting down next to him.

I would normally stay put, but I felt that it would be okay to sit by him. Yet, there was still a small part telling me to be careful.

"My real name is Benjamin." Hayes says once I'm seated.

"Seriously?" I say chuckling.

"Honest. But Shanley, can I ask you a question?"

"I suppose." I say smiling.

"Why were you so scared before, did something happen?" my smile instantly fades.

"Not exactly, it's kinda a long story."

"I've got time." he responds, grinning.

That smile was something special. It was contagious. There was something about that smile that made me want to trust him. Though it was hard, I at least wanted to give it a try.

"Well it started when I was younger. I was so nervous around the other kids. My parents thought I was just shy, but it was something more than that. I wouldn't be able able to speak around them. If they said something to me, my brain twisting it into some sort of insult. I got so angry. I would react violently, hitting them or yelling back in response. I couldn't control it. I felt like everybody was against me. That if I would get close, they would turn around and stab me in the back. I was so scared, and I didn't know why. I was just a little five year old, afraid of human contact. When my parents got a call from my teacher about my behavior, they knew something was wrong. They took me to a psychiatrist where I had to take multiple tests. They came to the conclusion I had paranoia. Basically, I have an irrational sense of distrust which brings rage and hatred, I easily take offense, have difficulty with forgiveness, have a defensive attitude, fear being taken advantage of, have an inability to relax, am stubborn, and am quite a perfectionist."

"Wow."

"Ya, so sorry about bumping into you earlier. It was an accident, I swear."

"It's fine, I understand. But why are you opening up to me know?"

"I'm not really sure. There's something different about you."

"Good or bad?"

"Good, very good. Now here's my question for you, why did you keep trying to talk to me?"

"Honestly, I don't know. You seem special. Something about you what's me to get to know you."

"Good." I respond simply.

And that's exactly what it was, good.