Joeck one shots 💞

Back to you

•Jack's POV•

It had been months since the day my life spiralled out of control, months since the day I lost everything, since I lost the one.

I had been drinking heavily ever since just to forget my problems, only finding out that the next day I remembered even more.

My friends had given up on trying to help me. They couldn't keep control of me and soon found out I was a lost cause. Not even Mikey, my childhood friend, checked up on me ; he stopped caring when I told him to go away. I told him that I could handle everything, that I would get better soon but little did I know that my problem would get worse...

The morning started out like any other morning: a banging headache, two paracetamols and a pint of water. I carried on the day like normal: checking the guys Instagram profiles, getting jealous and then drinking my problems away. The only thing that was different was that my phone rang, someone was actually wanting to talk to me.

I picked up the phone and heard a familiar voice, one I hadn't heard in ages, one I knew very well. It was my brother, the one and only Conor Maynard. I was very confused about why he was was calling and how he got my number, I'd gotten a new phone just to block the past out but now it was creeping up on me again.

"Hey Jack! Wow, you actually picked up, how are you? No Conor, that's a stupid question - he's been hiding away for months so of course he's not okay! Sorry Jack, I'll start again. Hi! How you getting on? Is that better, I don't know."
It was weird to hear my brother speak, something sparked inside of me as he spoke - it felt good.
"Hey Conor... I don't really know what to say right now. It's not really a conversation for over the phone..." I sighed, why did my stupid brain just mess up my chances of talking to Conor again?

"Don't worry bro, I can come over tonight if you wanna talk about it? I mean, if you're comfortable with that..."
Well that was a relief, turned out I didn't screw up. Of course I agreed but worry started to fill my body.
" Okay! I'll come in 5! Oh, it's gonna be great seeing you again, after all these months! Right, bye Jack!"

And with that he was gone and I was left alone again. The worry built up even more. What was I gonna say? Did he actually care about me? Oh god, I couldn't tell him about the drinking problem, or any other problems for that matter. Then I realised, I had no time to worry. Conor was gonna be there in 5 minutes and the flat looked like a right tip, I didn't even want to look in a mirror to see what I looked like.

Those minutes felt like the shortest 5 minutes of my life. It was like I'd only just lifted my finger and the doorbell went off. The worry was too much, I broke down and slumped onto the sofa. Tears fell down my face as I whispered
"I can't let him know, I can't let him know" over and over again.

"Jack! Jack? Can I come in?" And with that, the door gave way and there stood a shocked Conor Maynard.

My brother stood in the doorway looking a lot neater than me, although he said it was his lazy clothes. His mouth formed the shape of an "o" to show how shocked he was. This left me feeling guilty.
"I'm sorry Jack, if I knew what you were living like then I would of called sooner. I thought you had everything under control but it seems my thoughts are wrong... Hey? Are you okay?" He looked down me as I sunk into the sofa and covered my eyes. If I couldn't see the mess that I'd created then I couldn't worry, at least that's what my crazy mind to me. Conor came and sat next to me, his nose crinkled at the stench of alcohol as he came closer.
"Jack? Do you, do you have a drinking problem?"

This was the question I'd been waiting for, dreading since the minute I started drinking. This was the time to admit to what I'd done to myself; and so I did.

"Yes... yes I do. I'm sorry Conor for letting down our family. I bet they're not worried about me at all though, none of them will be. I've always been the misfit and this is no exception. I've let down my friends big time though and I'm sorry, please tell them that I'm okay but I need time to pick myself up again. I haven't been alright since the minute..."
And I paused, my mind taking me back to the day it all started.

(Flashback)

I sat down next to him and sighed, I could tell this wasn't gonna be like our other chats. Just looking at him made me cry, I didn't know if I was gonna see that face again.

The boy next to me sighed as well and stared off into the distance. He took a deep breath and spoke:
"  look Jack, don't get me wrong, you're an amazing person but these last few months haven't been up to your standards. All those late night drinking sessions and going out every night by yourself, this isn't you. I'm sorry Jack, I've had enough of you not being there for me. It was my birthday last week and you weren't even in town, you were in LA with bloody Anth! Yes, I know you left me a gift but that isn't the point. The point is that I needed you there with me when I blew out those candles, when I opened my presents, when I ate my birthday meal - but you weren't there...
I'm sorry babe but this is it, I'm done."

And with that the love of my life left me stranded on my own. I didn't know what to do at that point, my life had completely fallen apart in one chat. It got worse when I heard my door slam, it was official. Me and Joe were over, done, finished.

( end of flashback )

"Look Jack! You need to talk to Joe about this, it'll only go downhill even more if you just leave it!" My brother sat up and looked me in the eye, I could tell he was serious about this.

"But I can't, I can't see him again. I'll just break down in front of him, I'll embarrass myself. I can't even begin to think about what I would say!"
How could I talk to him after all this time. I'd drifted away from the group and I was no longer a part of anything. It wouldn't be easy to talk to any of them.

"How about I invite the guys over right now. We'll chat and watch stuff then probs drink a lot of shit that isn't good for us then go to bed with banging headaches. It'll be fun! Also it'll give you a chance to catch up with them and apologise for not being there."
Conor grabbed his phone and scrolled to where his group chat was - he added me.

Conor - Hey! Jack has resurfaced from his hole! Welcome him!

Oli - omg Jack! You're okay! We need to catch up!

Josh - well well well, if it isn't the person who ruined Joe's life.... How you doing?

Caspar - buddy! I agree with Oli, we need a catch up day

Mikey - hi ......

Joe - .........

I couldn't believe what Josh said, he was right but could of said it nicer than that. I began to swell up with tears and memories of the good days were we'd all hand out and laugh. I wish it could be that again but it would never be the same.
"So then, you up for it?" Conor asked, I had to think for a long time but I finally made up my mind.

"Let's do it."