Love & Pain: Rain

Only.

A way to survive to the cold night.
A way to get to you.
A way to protect ourselves.

You were there waiting.
So was I.

I see your shadow.
The smoke of your cigarette,
escaping from your parted lips.

Smirking,
you take a last blow before throwing it away.

Your arms waiting for my body,
my body waiting for yours.

The smell of cigarette is intoxicated,
reminds me of you,
reminds me of us.

You play with your lighter,
opening and closing it,
sometimes even lighting it.

No tint in your arms,
grey plain shirt,
tight enough jeans,
nonchalant gaze,
casually meeting mine.

When it does,
I look away quickly.

You laugh with your mates,
still, you're nonchalant about everything.

Voice,
clear husky voice,
low,
raw,
manly.

Call me out.

I feel out of place.
I'm new.

Honestly, I don't know you.
Caught my eye, though.

I wonder myself,
why am I always looking for someone?
Someone to love me.

I sit by the coffee shop near office,
headphones on,
indie music playing loudly,
expecting a miracle to see you,
A coincidence,
encounter in here,
maybe sit with me at the booth,
get to know each other better.

See you play with your lighter.

I was attracted.
I hated it.
I always lose.

People around me in their own thing,
just as me,
as I think back of today.

Thought I might be pretty to you.
Guess you're not interested.
Maybe in no one.

I wonder what the future will bring.
And the people that will bring with it.

I only want someone good,
I only ask for kindness.
I only ask for trust.
I only ask for happiness.
I only ask for good things.
I never get what I want.
Nor even what I need.

Wonder when then.

Hope it's soon.
Really soon.

For now,
I'll be patient.
I'll see what happens.