Mountain Dew Red // Be More Chill + Dear Evan Hansen

🎮Philophobia🎮

Edit: I just realized I fucked something up but it's fixed now so yay

Philophobia
(noun) A fear of being in love or falling in love.

TRIGGER WARNING:
-Boyfs angst
-suicide

Thank you so much Walls_Could_Talk for this idea!<3

•-•~•-•~•-•

Jeremy was devastated. His best friend of twelve years, his Player One, had slit his wrists in a suicide attempt and succeed. And whose fault was it? Jeremy's.

Jeremy was the one who took the Squip. Jeremy was the one listened to it. Jeremy was the one who ignored Michael. Jeremy was the one who willingly turned on Optic Nerve Blocking. Jeremy was the one who yelled at him. Jeremy was the one who called him jealous. Jeremy was the one who called him a loser. Jeremy was the one who didn't get back to the bathroom in time.

Maybe if Jeremy has been quicker, he could've gotten Michael out of the bathroom before he bled out and was engulfed in flames.

Jeremy was the only one at fault.

He cried when he heard the news about Michael. He had been to late. Michael was dead. At first, every piece of evidence pointed to the fire, but then, the multiple doctors and nurses that were checking on everyone who fell victim to the fire found something else; bright red self harm scars that were still slightly dripping with blood.

Michaels death was a confirmed suicide.

This hurt Jeremy more than any pain he'd ever felt before. It hurt so much worse than when his mom left, or the first time he got bullied back in eighth grade. It all just hurt so much, and he was the one to blame. And of course it didn't help that Jeremy had come to love Michael.

Ever since that one dreadful day, Jeremiah Heere has vowed to never love again. He couldn't, he was to scared to even try.

Though, one man did help him through all the hurt, all the pain, and teach him to love again.

Jake Dillinger.

•-•~•-•~•-•

I'm not sure if I like how this going but I might make a part two