From Bully to Boyfriend •|Lams|•

Chapter 16

{Alex's POV}

It had been a few months since me and John had....you know...put the ding dong in the donut. Don't judge me.

Anyways, ever since, John had been acting.... different over the past month.

What I mean is, he's become a lot more sexual.

For example, last week we were watching a Disney movie, and next thing I know, he's on my lap and sucking my neck. The day before, I caught him deepthroating a banana at breakfast. Not that I don't mind John having a high sex drive.

It's just, he's been wanting it over and over again for weeks now. I'm starting to feel used...

But I can't tell him. I refuse to. What if he gets upset?

All I do is sit on the couch, scrolling through my phone. It's what I've been doing for the past hour, though really I've just been thinking to myself. That's when a suddenly felt a pair of hands begin to massage my shoulders.

"Hey babe~" John cooed in a sexual tone. Oh no...

I uncomfortably smiled at him, pretending not to be bothered. I mean, now that I think about it, I'm just being a baby..

John sweetly kissed my neck, leaving little nips and licks here and there. "I want you, Papi~"

"J-John..." I groan softly. I don't want this, but I don't want to say no. If I say no, he could feel unwanted, but if I say yes, I know I'll regret it...

Yet, before I know it, I'm being dragged to the bedroom by my freckled boyfriend.

We both lay on the bed, panting. John seemed to absolutely love it. Me, on the other hand, I just...it was so uncomfortable. Normally, I'd be down for sex. Hell, I used to hook up all the time in highschool. But...it's just... something was different...

John nuzzled his head under my chin lovingly. "Damn, Papi, you were so good~"

"Thanks..." I said in a quiet voice.

I felt like crying. I just wanted to fucking sob my heart out. John wanted this so badly, but I don't, but the last thing I want to do is disappoint John.

I couldn't contain it anymore. The burning hot tears that collected in my eyes finally fell with a pathetic sob.

John shot up and looked at me with a sympathetic face. "Alexander?! What's wrong?!"

I could barely muster the courage to choke out words. "J-John I-I can't do-can't do this! I-I love you, but-but I r-really don't want this! S-Sex lately just t-thinking about it m-makes me-makes me want to gag and I-I feel like such a freak!"

I felt John's warm arms wrap around me and kiss my head.

"Alex, honey, you should have told me. I had no clue I was putting that pressure on you. I'm so sorry," he spoke in a calming voice, running his finger tips through my hair. He knew I loved it when he did that. "You absolutely do not have to apologise for not wanting to have sex. I love you for you, Alexander, not how you preform in bed."

I hiccuped slightly, calming down from my sobbing fit.

"Alexander, may I ask you a question?"

I nodded, wiping the tears out of my eyes so I could see my beautiful boyfriend clearly.

"Do you think you might be asexual?"

That would explain a lot. I mean, yeah, I think about pleasure sometimes, but there had always been this discomfort with the subject of sex. It's like, I just didn't experience that attraction. I had wanted to have sex with John, but purely because I wanted to make love to him. I wanted us to have a passionate moment.

I nodded my head, pulling John into my lap and hugging him close. John sweetly kissed the tip of my nose and whispered a small, "I love you", in my ear.

And that's how we spent the rest of the night. Cuddling, talking, crying, laughing. But what made it amazing, was my beautiful, accepting, boyfriend.