Stay With Me (Joshler)

Anønymøus

Josh pov

Of course
I wave at a guy once because he looked like he had spaced out and I vaguely know him. And Brendon went and grabbed him. He looks really awkward around Bren so I'm kind of curious about how he'll react to our mess of a group.

They walk over and Bren introduces all of us. He tackled Ryan so I bet this guy already knows they're together.

The one thing that really got me was how much Bren assumed I knew the guy. Like I saw him once but that was it.

He introduced himself. Tyler. I like it. It suits him. But of course Breadbin ruined it by saying

"You know ma boi here" and explained how I knew who Tyler was. Now I bet Tyler thinks I'm a stalker. Either way I'm kind of glad that Brendon had to be an idiot and invite him. It may sound stupid but I really don't want this kid to get bullied and if he didn't join a group quick, he would have been. I'm not gonna be his friend, but I'd like it if he would stay safe.

||-//

Later that day, the bell rang for music class to end and I packed my things and got ready to leave. I thought back at the day and realized that Tyler and I had no classes together except music. I'm not mad about it, though. If I had more classes with him, I might accidentally become his friend. And if I become his friend, I might get attached and when he leaves that stupid haunted house, I will break. Again. We can't have that.

I wait for Tyler to leave so that I don't pass him on the way home. I saw him walking to school this morning so I drove to make sure to avoid him. I assume he will be walking home too, so I hang back.

While I'm waiting, I see that someone left something in one of the practice rooms. These rooms are very small almost closet-like places you are supposed to go to practice voice or instruments in silence, but most people just go to slack off. I saw the book there because, again, I needed to avoid Tyler.

I lean over and grab the book. It looks really old and/or very used. Some pages are torn out and the leather is soft and tattered. I got curious so I opened it. The moment I opened it I felt a wave of guilt. This was a diary. And I was totally about to read it.

I read through the first page. It kinda seems like whoever was writing in it was kind of word vomiting onto the page. Like they didnt expect anyone to need to read or understand what it says. I get it. It's just to release feelings without exploding.

I read a bit more, trying to avoid moving any pages around that are shoved in there, and wow. This person seems really tortured. It seems as though they think they have another person inside their head who's constantly telling them what's wrong with them. They cut to get rid of the voice temporarily. I can tell this is very precious to them as there are tears all over the pages smudging some of the words and tearing through the paper and there's blood stains all over it that I assume are from the cutting.

I want to know who this is. I want to help and try to comfort them. But all of the pages are just signed "anønymøus". Probably just so that is doesn't feel too much like therapy or something and more like an anonymous confession to lift weight off of their chest.

Im suddenly very conscious about the time and shove it into my bag and leave the room to go home.

[hey how's it going I'm fine I have soda so I'm happy]