Blind Promises

27. Martha's Vineyard

After the fast-paced turmoil of North Carolina, the calm laid back feeling was welcome. More information had been piled on them, Gwen more so than any of them. She was doing her best to process what she could.

Gwen was curled up into a ball on the couch staring out the window of Liam's parents' place on Martha's Vineyard. Rich explained it was an old property but Liam wanted to keep it, they just bought a new one south in Edgartown. It would have helped if any of those names meant anything to her. The beach was beautiful beyond the cottage, she could see why Liam would want to hold on to it.

"I know about Scott," Liam whispered.

Her head was the only thing poking out from the fuzzy blanket she'd made a nest in. The day had been a particularly hard one, yesterday Rich had sat down with them to fully catch them up on all the information that had to be held back. Some from Liam, some of it from her, they had to come clean on just how much each knew about what was going on.

Many parts of the role Mitchel had played in Liam's failed capture had included her and how she had come to be in his life. She already knew it wasn't by accident, but knowing just how far it went was hard to swallow. Scott, she just didn't want to think about him but it had to be discussed. Rich had told her alone that Mitchel sent Scott her way intentionally, she assumed Liam meant in general as Rich hadn't told Liam that much.

She sighed, "You know Scott's name, perhaps what he looks like, maybe even what he did, but not the terror that he caused. And that's okay, I'm glad about that, I don't want you to know that, because it's over and I'll never go back to that life again. For anyone. Not even you, and I love you more than anything."

He sat behind her and wrapped himself around the ball she'd made. "Is that why you think I can't live with the ending to your story? What if I don't think it's the ending? What if I want to write the end?"

"Liam, you are so good and so special. It's a huge burden to bear, I'm aware you know what my medication is for, what it treats, but it's not a cure and it's not even all that effective. I still have nightmares, the depression and anxiety become debilitating, I can't put that on you. It's not fair for you to have to deal with my shit, too. I do love you, more than you know, and that's why. I've had a ton of CBT and I'm still a mess. My baby steps are wearing off a little at a time, I'm trying to regress. I'm fighting it," she explained. Tears streamed down her face as she watched the rough waves crash against the pebbled shore, the day was cloudy to match her mood.

His head nuzzled hers, "Who better to understand your issues than someone who has his own? They're not the same, but the results are. Gwen, it won't be easy living with me either. I know you and Rich have talked extensively, I'm aware that he told you what happened to our unit, he and I are the only two left alive out of eight men. Eight men who were like brothers, Rich and I are close but we were all the same. We had to be, and then they were gone. Just like that, except Rich and I. He had it worse than I did, at least I came out with an injury, he walked away with a few pieces of shrapnel and superficial burns. You have no idea the guilt he carries. My nightmares are horrific, but you know that don't you? You wake up drenched in my sweat and try to silence my screams."

"If that's my burden for loving you, so be it." She thought about Rich a moment, the photo books he gave Liam after he found out he could see were so extensive that she had no idea what they meant, not until she got to the ones that started the day after she met him. Then she realized the significance. And just how much of a sneaky bastard Rich was. "Rich loves you more than anyone I've ever seen except me. It's sweet, I hope it always stays that way."

"We're bonded by something that can't be broken." Liam kissed the side of her face.

Gwen laid her head on his arm, "Mitchel sent Scott into my life. All but introduced him to me. He hand-picked him and singled me out. Planted the seeds of desire in Scott's sick mind. Then he sat back and watched it all come together. I imagine international espionage is a wait it out sort of plot. He knew what Scott would do to me, Liam. Mitchel knew what sort of guy he was and he singled me out because of the color of my hair, the curve of my hips, maybe even the shade of my eyes, I don't know. What sort of sick freak does that?"

"A nasty son of a bitch. He was so underground we can't uncover his agency."

"I'm not sure it matters to me. Do you know what I endured because Mitchel wanted me to move to the West Coast? Oh no, couldn't have offered me a job I couldn't refuse or anything decent like that. I think he also wanted me to be irreparably broken so that I wouldn't trust you or anyone. The problem with that was, I'm a good judge of character usually. Mitch couldn't foresee that, he didn't know me, but he got lucky, Scott flew under my radar."