I won't say I'm in love-CatrAdora

1// ᴄʀᴜsʜɪɴɢ? ᴡʜᴏ's sʜᴇ?

{Authors note:
Hey! I'm thinking I might write this in 1st person? And prolly switch to 3rd sometimes? I'll figure it out
Enjoy! -Marisol🌻}
Adora's pov
I didn't mean to develop a crush on Catra. Honest. But with each passing day, it became harder and harder not to. The way her eyes are uniquely colored. The way her ears perk up at the sound of her name. The fact that she slept at the end of my bed each night to protect me at the horde. Or maybe to protect herself.  The others always backed off from teasing each other if I was around. But all of these were reasons I found myself slowly falling in love with her. I wasn't delusional-- we were childhood friends, it was the world's biggest cliché, but I wouldn't have minded if that particular cliche came true. Then I discovered something. Something big that set me apart from the horde. I (apparently) had this cool alter-ego Princess named She-Ra that was (apparently) a big deal. A huge deal. I met Glimmer and Bow, and together we started figuring out the mess that had become my life. We're a best friend squad now. Inseparable.  I can't imagine how Catra must've felt when she realized I wasn't coming back with her. I'm sure she was worried sick. Up until she learned that I was now her biggest enemy. But hey, I bet she was partly glad. She became the next horde commander-- pretty important, because I would know. Shadow Weaver's right hand catwoman. Suits her. That's what I keep telling myself as I lie awake at night in an insanely comfortable bed in the castle of BrightMoon. I can hear Glimmer's soft snores down the hall, and I'm sure Queen Angella is finishing up on her nightly routine if she's not already in bed. I toss and turn some more before sitting up with a huff. Standing up, I pull on my boots (I'm still in my clothes) and walk over to retrieve my jacket and sword. Hesitating, I look down at my sword. I hardly go anywhere without it. But I'm sure I won't be gone long. Leaning it against my wall, I walk over to the window, which is already cracked open enough to squeeze through. I swear, sometimes it's just too easy. After carefully making my descent down to the ground, I look around carefully before choosing the path leading into the forest and starting to walk down it.
I walk for quite some time, and sometimes I swear the path disappears from underneath my feet. Looking around, I notice I can't see the telltale lanterns that light up BrightMoon at night. I must be outside of the kingdom's borders.
Idiot! You should have brought your sword. What if some rando attacks you while you're off guard?
I chide myself. Just like I've often done before. Most often chiding myself for accidentally flirting with or being unable to confess to Catra. But no. I'm over her. I promise. She and I can never be. She's too loyal to the horde. Which is why I know I'm in immediate trouble when I hear her familiar purr call out from above me.
"Hey, Adora."
I freeze, turning around to face her, seeing that she's (predictably) perched on a branch higher than me in a tree nearby. "Hello, Catra." I reply, trying to keep my voice neutral and emotionless. And failing miserably. I can't help it. She's my (ex?) best friend. She smirks as she looks down at me, humming. "Nice night for a walk, isn't it?" I frown slightly. "How did you know I'd be out?" I ask calmly. Catra shrugs. "You're predictable. And you're a classic insomniac. Don't forget, I've known you since forever." She says smugly, her tail twitching below her. She's having fun with this, I can tell. I swallow and nod. "How could I? I've got years worth of memories." I say,  smiling a little and tapping my temple. Catra nods thoughtfully before looking down at me. "Do you want to come up? We've got a lot to catch up on.." She asks, her ears twitching slightly. I nod, skillfully climbing up beside Catra and looking over at her. "What's up?"

"The sky." Catra deadpans before cracking a grin. "Just kidding. Well, the sky is up, but that's not what I called you up here for." She laughs, taking a deep breath. "I want you to come back to the horde." She says softly. I freeze. I can't breathe. Can't speak. Can't say anything except for a strangled "oh". Catra looks at me, here gaze filled with care and adoration(adoration? Sorry, not the time to make a pun about my own name). "I want it and Shadow Weaver wants it. Even Kyle misses you, and you did nothing but scold him for his mistakes. Please, Adora." Catra pleads, her ears flattening as she gives me her pouty face. Damn her. She really knows how to get to me. But she won't ever know the truth about my feelings. I won't allow it. Not when I'm also her greatest enemy. "Catra, I-" She interrupts me. "We can start over! Forget She-Ra and come back with me! She's irrelevant! In fact, she won't even have to exist anymore if you leave that dumb sword, pack your stuff, and come back to the horde with me. Shadow Weaver really misses you. She doesn't like me very much, but she's trusting I can convince you to come back to the horde so you can be the commander again." She smiles that adorable smile at me(adorable? Sorry,  not the time.) "Please, Adora?"
I shake my head no. "I'm really sorry,  Catra. But I can't. Don't you see? Shadow Weaver probably twisted your mind to convince you to come here. She can't be trusted."
"How can you say that?!" Catra asks in shock. "Shadow Weaver just had to mention your name and I agreed into it. Plus, she raised both of us! All of us, really! And you've always been her favorite, anyways. You just don't know what it's like to have to work for anything. All your life you've had things handed to you." She snaps, tears welling in her eyes. "Meanwhile, the rest of us stood in your shadow and knew that we'd never really be good enough as long as you were around. I just got the position I have,  and already I'm here begging you to come back to the horde. To come back to us,  Adora. Don't you want that? To be able to be by my side? For me to be by yours?" She asks softly. I hate seeing her like this. I hate it. I hate it.  I hate it.  "Catra.." I begin. "I can't just return to the horde. I can't just forget She-Ra. I have friends who depend on me. I can't accept your offer. I'm sorry." I can see something shatter in Catra's discolored eyes and rush on. "But maybe, you can accept mine?" I ask quietly, taking her hands. "Leave the horde and come with me.  We can be by each other's side, and still a great team." I say,  smiling a little at her. She shakes her head almost imperceptibly, tears streaking her fur. "Oh, Adora.. They've poisoned you.." She whispers quietly. I'm taken aback, looking at her confusedly. "Excuse me?" Catra sighs. "You don't get it, do you? They've made you blind.. Messed up your mind.." But I can set you free.  She doesn't even have to ask to know I got the reference. Middle School. We were both obsessed with Heather's. But what the hell? She's comparing me to Veronica? And she's comparing herself to JD? Oh, Catra, I love you,  but sometimes you make my heart hurt with the shit you do. Quoting "Meant to Be Yours" is an example. You sly potato. But Catra can't help it. I've never once commented that I'm crushing on her. Ever. So, she was bound to do this every so often.
"Please, Adora. Come back with me. You don't need all those princesses." Catra says, squeezing my hands gently. "Catra, I can't. I'm sorry. But if you just left the horde-" She interrupts me,  a wild look in her eyes. "What if we ran away together and collectively ditched the sides we're on? Just started running and never looked back?" I can see she thinks this is a genuinely good idea. "Come on,  Adora. It can just be us. Only us. Nothing before will count anymore or matter!" She exclaims, quoting Dear Evan Hansen. She's all over the place with references today.
"Catra, do you hear yourself? We can't possibly do that. I'm She-Ra, remember??" I point out. Catra sighs, dropping her hands. "And I'm a very disappointed girl who was just trying to help her best friend and got shot down by doubt and importance." My  heart sinks. "I'm sorry, Catra I-" She shakes her head. "Just... Sleep on it, okay? Consider it. Either that or come back to the horde and forget the other idea. But I need you to know I can't do your idea. Not now. Shadow Weaver depends on me." I sigh,  moving to hug Catra. "I hope you realize one day that she's not as great as you may think."I murmur in her ear before jumping down. She looks down at me sadly. "I say the same thing to you about that princess club of yours." I smile sadly up at her. "They're not so bad." Catra just sighs. "Bye, Adora." I wave.  "Bye, Catra."
She smiles at me a little before disappearing. I make my way back to the castle.
Just as I'm clambering into my room as quietly as I can manage through the window, I jump to see Glimmer's silhouetted figure sitting on my bed. She turns my bedside lamp on, her arms crossed as she scowls at me.  "And where in Etheria were you?"