Illusions | Loki & Jane

24. I Hate You!

"Wait!"

It reminded her of the day, when she had thought she would lose John to those madmen in the streets forever. She had no idea, that a life as an attorney could be so dangerous. The minutes, she had waited at home, expecting a call from the police any moment felt like hours. How could he be so stupid, to put her in a cab home and face those freaks alone? He would never survive or at least he'd be gravely injured. She couldn't stop herself from crying, even if nothing had happened yet. The scientist was pacing up and down the apartment, sobbing in silence. How was she going to survive on her own, without the man she loved so much?
It could have been minutes, maybe it had been hours she had waited for him to return, but finally the door of the apartment opened.
"JOHN!" She had cried, flying into his arms, before he could even enter his home. She cried into his chest, feeling his arms grabbing her tightly. She grabbed the fabric of his shirt on his back, pulling him closer. She absorbed his scent, the scent which was a combination of the smell of apples, a forest after a downpour and the odour of a cold winter-day, covered in snow. The scent she knew so well was finally reaching her brain, knowing he was really there, he was real, he had survived.

But this time it was not John Jane was scared about, this time it was Thor, who was striding slowly towards the iron giant. "What is he doing?" She asked shocked. Her friends and Thor's friends had just wanted to retreat, when Jane turned around searching Thor, finding him alone with the monster.

The God of Thunder walked past the demolished buildings and cars in the now abandoned streets. The black iron creature approached him. Was he going to get himself killed? She couldn't bare the thought of losing him. Even though she didn't know him very well, yet, but she wanted to. There was a strange urge inside of her to find out all about him, his passions, his interests, his detests and his way of living. She didn't know why she was so interested in him, it was like a striving for finding answers and for some reason something inside of her told her he would give her the answers for the questions she had carried with her these past months. The questions regarding John and the theories about the universe may be answered by this man, even though she could not understand the coherence, it was what her gut was telling her. He reminded her so much of John, even though he was so completely different, however the topics they had talked about and the things they'd been through were somehow strangely similar. She wanted to get to know him, nevertheless if he was being killed, she would never find out and would never know what and who he really was.

"Brother, whatever I have done to wrong you," She heard Thor say, "whatever I have done to lead you to do this, I am truly sorry."

Jane felt her heart racing. The blonde man was awfully close to the giant now. If the stories were true, Thor had told her - and she really believed it now - then it seemed that he was addressing Loki, his brother. Why would anybody destroy a whole city to attack his own and only brother? The way Thor had talked about Loki, it was clear to her that he loved him. If she would have a sibling, no matter what he or she had done to her, she would never do something like this in her life.

"But these people are innocent." Thor continued. "Taking their lives will gain you nothing."

The helmet opened and the flames of destruction danced inside of it. The metal creature was now ready to attack. Jane tensed. The man was now standing in front of the giant, confident and determined. "So take mine and end this."

No! She heard the word in her head, pounding like a heartbeat. Please don't!

Sif was breathing deeply and Jane heard her wince at Thor's words.

It was a long moment, where they were all standing there watching the scenario, hoping that it would not end badly. She felt the tension of Thor's friends next to her, however her focus was merely fixed upon the blond and handsome man, sacrificing his life for the well-being of the townsfolk, including her.

The Helmet closed. Thank God. Jane thought, fighting back the urge of running to him to embrace him. The situation gave the impression, that Loki would not take Thor's life, the beast took a step back and turned and the astrophysicist already wanted to sigh relieved, when the giant metal creature swung his arm and aimed at the God. He hit him forcefully.

Jane's heartbeat and her breathing stopped. She saw how the metal hand clashed with Thor's face, making him launch into the air.

"NOOO!" She screamed and started to run towards Thor.

The God flew through the air due to the impact and landed with a smack on the stone floor. In only seconds Jane was by his side. "Thor." She breathed, taking his head in her hands carefully. "Stay with me." She tried to suppress the urge to cry. She didn't want to break in front of him. She had to be strong for him, since he lay broken on the floor.
Nevertheless it seemed she didn't have to be strong, because Thor smiled at her sincerely. "You're safe now." He croaked. "It's over." The whisper aside with his last breath left his lips as soon as his eyes closed.

"No it's not over." She couldn't stop the tears this time. "No, Thor." She whispered agitated. "It's NOT over." She tried again as if he could hear it and decided to live all of the sudden again. The words echoed in her head. It's not over. It were the words she had said to John as well, when he had left her. Why was this always happening to her? She finally had found a man she liked since she had met John and now he had to die.
Her eyes snapped up at the iron giant, which had turned around and walked back to the desert, where he had came from.

"I hate you!" She cried as loud as she could. "HEAR ME?! I HATE YOU LOKI!" The metal creature halted and seemed to consider turning around, however didn't and continued his walk back to the bifrostmarking, where all the S.H.I.E.L.D.-workers had gathered again, ready to attack the creature as good as possible.

"I hate you." She whispered, more to herself, as she cried silently while her gaze wandered back to the lifeless body of the God of Thunder. She shook her head, stroking the hair out of Thor's face and sobbed: "I wanted to get to know you."

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A/n.: oooh it's sad! Poor Jane...

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