Here We Go Again.

Panic

The week flew by fast as fuck. We were back in California and enjoying the summer.

I was sitting in my room cleaning... surprisingly when my phone starts ringing off the hook. I grab it seeing Sam's name. I pick it up.
"Hey," I said.
"Hi," he replied his tone sounding panicked.
"You good?" I asked.
"I'm having a panic attack," he tells me. "I can't breathe Jo," his voice cracks.
"Hey. It's okay! Where are you?" I asked.
"Outside of my house," he rushes out.
  "I'll be there... are you okay?" I asked kind of worried now. I slip on my slides.
  "I think," he mumbles. "You don't have to come. We can just talk on the phone," he adds.
  "I'm already on my way you live a minute away," I tell him leaving my house and going towards his. His breathing was erratic, I could hear it. I heard a little sniff like he was crying. What happened. "I'll be there in a minute Kay?"
  "Ok," he replies and we hang up. I was now worried so I speed walked the rest of the way.

I saw him sitting on the steps up to his house, head in his hands and his knee jumping up and down.
  "Sam," I said and he looked up with bloodshot eyes. What the hell. I take a step forward and he stands hugging me letting out a long breath. He doesn't say anything and just hugs me. I could feel his heartbeat against my chest how hard it was. "Hey, what's wrong?" I asked.
  "My dad," he pulls away and my heart immediately drops. "He's in the hospital. It's bad," he lets out rushed a jumbled. "I'm scared Jo."
I grab his hand pulling him to sit down on the steps with me.
  "I know," I said. "I'm sure things will be fine.." I add and I saw his lip quivering.
  "I'm not. He's pretty much on his death bed... it's fucking stage 3.." he says.
  "What happened?" I asked and his hand was shaking and I hold it. He stares at our hands.
  "Um... I guess he was having some pains... like bad ones and then he puked up blood. So my mom took him to the hospital. They said things aren't looking good and they needed more results and tests done," he tells me. "I needed to get out. I started to panic," he tells me his breath hitching.
  "Sam, you need to take a breath. You're gonna scare yourself," I tell him. "Listen. We're gonna wait on the results and then go on from there," I tell him.
  "I can't do it Jo. I won't let myself know what they say, because if they're bad... I don't know what I'll do. I can't deal with it. It's just making me more panicky and I can't control it," he blurts out his eyes moving frantically from our hands to the ground. "He can't die Jo.." his voice cracks and it makes me a bit sad. But I needed to be calm and collected for him at least.
  "And this doesn't mean he will. I'm not gonna be here and tell you to think positive because I know... it's hard and I know it doesn't work. But your dads alive right now, so you should take that as an advantage and not think about his death right now," I tell him surprise by myself for that. "Stop panicking because it's not helping you. It's gonna make you overthink and it's gonna make you feel worse about the situation," I add. "Things might be okay Sam. Seriously," I tell him and he finally looks at me biting his lip to stop if from quivering again.
  "I'm sorry for doing all this to you," he says.
  "Shut up, you don't new to say sorry. I'm your girlfriend," I tell him. "I'm always here for you Sam."
  "I know," he sighs. "I just think it's annoying," he groans. "And I know factually I look like a puss having a panic attack and crying," he says I roll my eyes.
  "Leave it up to you to be annoying," I tell him and he grins a bit.
  "Thanks for coming," he tells me leaning in and kissing me.
I felt the panic ware off of him and I felt relieved about it for him.
"Don't thank me," I tell him after we pull away. "I'm sure things will go fine.."
"Ya.." he sighs looking away again running a shaky hand through his hair. I lean my head on his shoulder he puts his arm around me pulling me close. "I'm worried for Dani," he adds.
"Sam. I know you're her brother and all and it's hard. But you really need to stop worrying about everything," I tell him.
"She hasn't been doing good. Seriously, the whole school thing and she's been depressed the whole time. And I'm dumb, I went to California like I could just fool around while my whole family is feeling like shit," he rants and I pull away from him looking at him. His eyes were watery but he was blinking rapidly to not let the tears fall. "I mean, I'm a bad person for that. My dads dying. I went to California and partied and... I should've been here for... for him..." I cut him off.
"Sam!" I said and he looks at me his chest moving up and down quickly. "Stop!" I tell him. "You're a teenager. I know shitty things are happening with your family, but you need to live, because if you don't you're gonna feel like shit. You're gonna worry, and be depressed and that's not good for you, no matter what's going on. You shouldn't feel bad for that," I said. "And Dani. She needs her time. She's a woman who will figure her schooling out. Ya you should be there for her and your mom during this, but you don't need to worry about her future life. She will end up doing what's best for her. And you going to California wasn't something you should feel bad about seriously," I say. He looks off shaking his head.
"Now I left my dad to go have a panic attack," he adds.
"Stop being annoying," I say and he sighs putting his head in his hands. "Hey. Everything will be fine Sam...." I pull his hands away and turn him to look at me. "You need to start by thinking positive, because when you're thinking negative... I'm telling you it's not what you need," I say.
"It's hard," he says.
"I know," I said. "But you have to try. For your dad," I add.
"How are you so sure of yourself? All the time?" He asks.
"I'm not," I say. "I just... act sure of myself. Believe me Sam before my mom I was even more headstrong than I am now," I say.
"I love you," he says catching me off guard and I look at him confused. "I meant it when I said I was falling in love with you," he adds. "You obviously don't need to say it back. I'm not expecting you to. But I needed to tell you."
"I love you too," I said and he smiles. "Obviously I meant it too when I said I was falling in love with you also."
"Thanks for everything. You're seriously the best," he says.
"Don't thank me Sam," I say. "It's annoying," I add.
"You make everything better," he says in a low voice, and it kind of made my heart melt. As dramatic and cheesy that is. It was true.
"I really do love you," I said and he turns to me and I kiss him. He relaxes and pulls me closer kissing back.
Everything in him seem to disappear. All the panic, sadness and worry. It was so nice to feel this for him.

I love Sam Pierce.

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A/N

GUYS!! They said it... fully. It happened. JAM moments like this right. ANYWAY. I hope you guys enjoyed this, not too long but I feel like it's been a while since my last update and wanna keep ya satisfied. And happy belated valentines days guys.

Just telling you, this book is ending soon srry. But I've got new content coming soon after this one. Check it out later guys. Thanks buns. Xoxo.

-Jana🤘🏽