And They Say...

Track 13: Finding Solace in Music

Melody's Point of View

What the hell? What is this?

Bakit kasama dito ang pangalan ko? What did I even do? At this point I'm not even sure if I see this as a good or bad thing.

"Nice," poker face na sabi ni Ingrid at binigyan ako ng thumbs up.

"Oh my God!" Lapit naman sa akin ni Venice at hinawakan ang magkabilang balikat ko. "Do you know what this means? This is a big thing! You're the first ever newbie to enter the list! I'm so proud of you!"

She hugged me and pulled Ingrid to hug her too. Para raw group hug.

She looks so excited at binalikan ang laptop para i-click ang picture ko. Pwede raw kasing makita ang percentage ng votes from there pati na rin ang monthly score na binibigay ng mentors namin.

Una naming nakita ang votes from the students. Sakto lang ang votes na nakuha ko kung ikukumpara sa ibang nasa top.

"You have pretty high votes to be honest. Hindi siya sakto lang considering na hindi ka pa matagal dito."

"Why would the students even vote me? Sabi mo nga bago pa lang ako. Hindi naman nila ako kilala para iboto."

"Maybe because of the rumors," Ingrid said. "See, a lot came to like you kahit nalilink ka kung kani-kanino."

"True! May mga supporters ka na!"

Supporters? But why? And how? I haven't even proved anything yet. Do I even deserve those so-called supporters?

Venice scrolled the page down and seeing the result of our mentors' grades there just answered my question.

I don't deserve those 'supporters'. Ang baba ng remarks nila sa akin. Rating from 1 to 10 ang pinakita na galing sa mentors. One being the lowest and ten being the highest. I got 2. This just proves I don't deserve to be on the list.

Ang lakas naman makapagbagsak ng confidence nito. Kung sabagay nga naman, bakit ba ako worthy para sa mas mataas sa 2? Nahuhuli na nga ako sa klase pa lang paano pa kaya kung buong school na?

Kaya lang kahit alam ko na, kahit tanggap ko na ayon ang nakuha ko, hindi ko pa rin mapigilan madisappoint at malungkot.

Dahil kilalang kilala ako ng bestfriend ko, naramdaman at napansin niya agad ang disappointment ko. Tinapik niya ako at saka ginulo ang buhok ko. "One step at a time." I'm still unsure sa nararamdaman ko and as if she can read my mind, pabiro niya akong tinulak. "You're just starting, Melody. You will get better. I'm sure of that."

That instantly lifts my mood. I smiled at her and nodded. "We're just starting. Both of us."

Ingrid rarely smiles in front of other people but she does it with me. Not as usual as the others but she does. Kaya when she smiled, it automatically made me feel better. So I gave her a hug as a sign of gratitude na rin.

"Both of you will do great," Venice assured us.

Yes. We will. Kahit baby steps man, at least we're moving.

***

"Baka binayaran ng parents niya 'yung mga bumoto sa kaniya."

"Ayan nga rin tingin ko. S'yempre di ba pumasok ka lang sa ranking ibang klase na. To think na newbie pa siya niyan ha."

Isang linggo lang. Isang linggong katahimikan lang please. Hindi ko ba talaga mararanasan 'yon? Hindi ko alam kung lapitin lang ba talaga ako ng chismosa o ano.