Chapter 7

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Chapter 7

“I’ll call you later…. Yep…. Alright, bye” I hung up the phone. Guilt had set in the second Justin called and the second I realized what I had just done to him. I felt ashamed and broken because I know what it feels like to have someone do something with someone else. I don’t want Justin finding out about this but I cant lie to him. I’m not breaking up with him I don’t even know where Vic and I stand now because honestly its been a it awkward.

We were all out for dinner right now and I stepped out to answer Justins call since when he called ealier I had ignored it, but I couldn’t answer it then. I was freaking out and having a panic attack. Of all the things I could have done, I had to cheat? And now I’m lying to him! I have to figure something out, I need to get a plan together or something. Not only did I cheat on Justin, but Vic cheated on Jaime too. I feel even guiltier knowing that I was the one to help him cheat on someone else. I groaned at myself, I need to stop thinking. I’ll deal with this how I deal with all my problems now. Instead of running away, I’ll deal with it one at a time. First thing is first, I need to talk to Vic. Maybe tomorrow though, since its still a bit of a touchy night. I took a few deep breaths and regained my mind before walking back in and meeting with the guys.

Every one smiled at me, including Vic. Although I know behind Vics smile was worry that Justin was going to find out about what happened, I in nodoubt was worried about that too. I gave him a reassuring smile as I sat beside Tony, telling him that everything was okay. I guess I am happy now though that Vic and I are conversing like normal people.

“What did ye old boyfriend want?’ Jaime asked, faking some stupid accent.

“Just checking up, you know, boyfriend things” I used to be acting cold towards him, but now I was trying to act as friendly as possible. Because if and when he finds out what happens, its not going to be exactly a wonderful site. At least I wouldn’t imagine it would be. Not too long late the waiteress came over to us and gave us our food we had ordered. I didn’t eat much cause I was feeling a bit too nervous to eat, but I did eat some cause of course I was starving. After sitting there talking for awhile we all decided to leave and head back to the studio and talk abit about the song and whatnot.

I didn’t talk much on the way home. My thoughts were clouding over at what happened between Vic and I. I feel horrible for what happened, and what I did. I know I shouldn’t be happy but theres this small spark in me that Vic just ignited. Its like I had been waiting for forever to feel his touch, and now that I have it I feel guilty. I hate him forever thing but its just so hard to let go of someone like him. I don’t know what Ill tell Justin though, I think that’s what I fear the most. I cant do this to him because for all I know it could tear the band apart. I felt the car stop and I realized we had already made it back home. We crowded into the building one at a time before sitting down to disscuss the music. I looked over at Jaime and Vic to see that Jaime was holding onto an annoyed Vic. Was he annoyed that Jaime was holding him? I know Vic prefers to be the dominate one so maybe he doesn’t like feeling small towards him. Regardless of what it was, I wasn’t in the mood to see it.

“I think I’m gonna go to bed, my head hurts. We can talk tomorrow” I said and before any one could protest I got out of there powerwalking to my room. I closed the door like I was being chased and I honestly kind of felt like I was too. My heart was pounding a bit heavier but I calmed myself down and was soon sitting on the edge of my bed. It wasn’t a lie when I said my head hurt, it was honestly pounding. So many things had happened today and I kinda wanted to sleep it off.

~

I woke up to buzzing, and not the noise, the feeling of something buzzing. I opened my eyes tiredly and placed my hand onto my leg where the buzzing was coming from, I must have thrown it onto my bed last night. I picked it up and answered it, not bothering to check the caller I.D.

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