People start staring when I enter.
Please look away...
The teacher stops talking and looks at me. It takes him a good minute to realize I'm a new student. Everyone won't stop staring.
Look away...
"And you are?" the teacher asks. I ignore his question and examine the room. Medium sized... dirty walls... lifeless.. And then I examine the teacher. Tall, dark-skinned, mid thirties, dark hair. The teacher clears his throat. "Young lady, are you lost?" he asks. "Uh-no. I-" it becomes hard to speak. "I'm not lost" I say as quick as I can. The teacher doesn't hear me. "Do you need help?" he begins to walk towards me. "I'm a new student" I say.
Make it stop
The teacher comes closer and closer, until we're two feet apart. He takes out his notebook and goes through it quickly.
"Alondra... Maytorena?" he asks. I take a gulp of air, and force out a response. "That's me" I say.
All of a sudden, his serious face shifts into an exultant one.
I'm not that scared.
"Alright Alondra" he says, "You can take a seat over there." He points to an empty desk by the corner of the room. I try not to rush to my seat.
Don't attract attention.
I take my seat next to this pale looking guy. The only pale kid in this this class, besides me.
Just breathe.
The teacher begins talking again. I don't pay attention, instead I just stare into a piece of paper.
I don't need this... I don't want this..
I start thinking about Jill, and how much she loves school.. And why. Jill's so smart, so talented.
I'm so dull... so lost all the time..
The teachers voice begins to fade.
It's working.
I begin to block out sound. I never liked school. I could never understand it.. I could never enjoy myself. This was my first year in High school. I stopped going to school after middle school. My parents enrolled me in some middle school, thats name sounded Navajo. I hated it from the start. I was always a timid person. People found that amusing. I was also very strong, I just never showed it. But the timid part... there was no hiding that. And eventually, people became fascinated by me. They enjoyed inflicting pain on me and taking advantage of me. Starting sixth grade, I was tormented by most of my classmates. Not all of them participated. But the majority did.
I was able to endure the agony and abuse for two years. For two whole years, I was harassed by my peers. Everyday I came home with a new scar or bruise. I didn't need to worry about my parents noticing though.
The harassment eventually came to an end, because of my poor impulse. I couldn't forget the day... even if I had to..
I sat next to Marc and Carrie Fitz. Both siblings. Both assholes. They had been tormenting me for two years straight. Marc and Carrie's parents knew my parents. Marc and Carrie knew about my brother. They knew my family like a book. I always thought they were creepy bastards... but mostly just bastards.
Like usual, Carrie decided to toy with me. She decided to use my own family against me.
The seventh period bell had rung, and Carrie waited for me at the door.
"Hey Alondra, how are you?" she asked.
"I'm fine" I said.
Carrie always had an ugly smile. "Oh! How fantastic!" she yelled. What a phony bitch..
