Descended Wish (Lesbian)

Chapter 1

"Wh—what did you say?" Nauutal ko na tanong. Para kasing ayaw magsink in sa utak ko yung mga nangyayari. Or maybe I was just dreaming—probably a nightmare.

Bumagsak ang balikat ni Kate kasabay ng kanyang luha. "I'm breaking up with you Mara."

Hindi ko maipaliwanag ang nararamdaman ko because it's too much, its too painful. But one thing is for sure though, gumuho ang mundo ko sa sinabi nya.

Kate and I are girlfriends for four years and a half now. Marami na kaming pinagdaanan pero lahat nang yon ay nalagpasan namin ng magkasama. We promised to love each other endlessly, pinanghawakan ko yung pangako nya na Kate will fight for me no matter what. Pero parang nagkaamnesia sya at nakalimutan yung pagmamahal namin para sa isa't isa. She even want to break my heart into pieces.

"Why.." Nanghihina na tanong ko sa babaeng unti unti akong pinapatay. "What did I do Kate? Nagkulang ba ako? If yes, I will chan—"

"You didn't do anything wrong okay Mara?" Pagputol ni Kate sa sinasabi ko. "It's just me.." Pareho kaming nahihilam sa mga luha namin. I know na nasasaktan sya pero hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit kailangan nya itong gawin. "It's just me—"

"Or your family." Mariin ko na sabi. For the record, I know Kate's family is never agree sa relationship namin. "But I thought you will fight for me?" My heart is aching as I stared hard painfully at her. "Nangako ka Kate.."

"I know.." Paghikbi ni Kate. "But I can't..." Pakiramdam ko huminto lahat, yung tibok ng puso ko, yung oras at yung mundo. "I'm deeply sorry Mara."

Pero kahit ilang beses pang magsorry si Kate sakin ay hindi nito mababawasan yung sakit na nararamdaman ko. Dahil kahit sa panaginip ay hindi ko naisip na iiwanan ako ni Kate. For all people...

Hinawakan ko ang kamay ni Kate in desperation. I'm still trying my best to change her mind. Ayaw kong itapon ang four years na pinuno namin ng sobrang pagmamahal. "Wag mo gawin sakin to Kate, you know much I love you. That I can't live a life with you by my side."

Pumikit si Kate na patuloy sa pag-iyak. Nakatingin lang ako sa kanya, hoping and praying. "Mara.." The sound of her voice gives me unsettled feeling in my stomach. "I love you, with no beginning, no end."
Hinawakan nya ang kamay ko para alisin sa braso nya at unti-unting lumayo from me. It hurts. "But we can't escape the fact that I'm still not enough for you."

Sinubukan kong hawakan ulit si Kate pero kusa na syang lumayo sakin. "No.." Umiling Kate. "You are more than enough to me. I'm not asking for anything—just you."

We stood there, looking at each other, saying nothing. But it was the kind of nothing that meant everything.

"Wag mong gawin sakin to Kate, marami pa tayong pangarap." Pagsusumamo ko.  I don't care if I look desperate basta maging okay lang kami ni Kate. "Please wag mo akong iwanan—hindi ko kakayanin.."

But her eyes were empty and I could feel something inside me break. "May darating na tamang tao para sayo Mara." Kita ko ang lungkot at sakit sa mukha nya bago sya tumalikod. "Dahil hindi ako yon, at hindi magiging ako."

So that was that. We were finally, finally over.

"Kate.." Pagsusumamo ko habang umiiyak.

Huminto naman si Kate pero nanatiling nakatalikod sakin. "Please don't make this really hard for the both us. I set you free not because I wanted too—" Tumaas at baba ang balikat nya. "Gusto ko makatagpo ka ng tao na kaya kang ipagmalaki, ipaglaban at panindigan."

My hands fell on my sides. "Kaya naman natin Kate basta magkasama tayo."

Dahan dahang lumingon sakin si Kate at parang tumigil ang tibok ng puso ko ng nagmamadali syang naglakad palapit sakin. Napapikit mata ako when she slammed her lips to me, we kisses each other in hunger and longing. Yes, I know this  is probably the last time.