Depressing Stuff

25

"Sorry my depression is such a problem for you"

"It is, get over it"

"Get ov- Get over it? You think I want this? You think I want to have this never ending feeling of emptiness? No. I don't. Do you have any idea what it's like to lose your mom and still have so much family but always feel alone? To be surrounded by your family and still not feel loved? To have to walk into the same room you shared with her everyday? Do you have any idea what it takes away from you to have a good day full of laughs and smiles just to come home and walk in your room and start saying 'Mom guess wha-' only to realize she's not there? I haven't been able to finish that sentence since I was nine. NINE. You really think I want to feel everything one day and nothing the next? You think it's easy to so badly want death but need life? You think its easy to know to you're breathing but you're not alive? God I wish I could reset time so I don't have to feel this way. I wish I didn't have to take these pills to make me feel. Trust me if I could just get over it, I would. In a heartbeat, no hesitation. You, on the other hand, don't understand because you get to go home everyday and be an ass to your mom. Treat her right because you never know when her last day is. You will regret it, that is a promise."