"Love Yourself"(BTSx MaleReader)

•Chapter 17• HAPPY

M/n POV

"Jungkook wasn't my first friend. I had one very special friend. He used to be very quiet and shy. Until he met me. Heh" I laugh a little remembering everything. "I use to be, so, happy." I send them a big and bright smile, their eyes widen. No one knew, not even Jungkook, nor Yoongi. All they know about it my dad, but they don't know why.

"You were like that with Jungkook too, no?" Tae questions getting up and I look at Jungkook like a sign for him to answer.

"No." He answers and frowns "M/n smiled but was never truly happy." He looks down. I look back at Tae to see his eye wide and his mouth open.

"Let's get back to the story yeah?" I say, he nods then sits back down. "He was my first love. The day I met him I knew I had to help him. He looked so empty. And I did help him, I spent every minute with him. We went to preschool and elementary together so it was easier. My family back then was such a perfect family, they liked him too. We all treated him with much love. My Family wanted him to keep me safe, they wanted him to protect me." I pause and look down then continue "He told me one day that he loved me more than a friend, that he wanted to protect me with all his will. We were only 13 years old, but I knew I loved him. He brought me so much joy, he made me happy." I stop feeling as if I couldn't talk anymore.

"What happened to him?" Jin asks and I smile, but this time a painful one and they can feel it.

"I-I killed him.." No one talks but Namjoon softly pushes me to tell more. "The day we got together we went on a 'date' to the movies. It was almost midnight, but we didn't care we wanted to be together. I smiled he smiled. We ended up going to the first place we met, the park." I smile sadly.

  "We sat all night there just talking. He was holding on to be like he was going to lose me, but for me it felt so, warm. It's like all the love I've ever felt didn't compare to it. I felt so safe. around 5 in the morning, we decided to go home...and I was just so happy. We were running and holding hands on our way to my house, we ended up playing the first game we've ever played, tag and he was it. I was running so fast and smiling and laughing, but I wasn't paying attention to where I was going."

flashback

"You'll never catch me!" I look ahead, but I'm not on the sidewalk anymore now I'm in the street, I turn around to see him running.

"N/n-nie look out!" I quickly look back around, I see a car coming and suddenly I can't move. Then I hear "Tag." I wake up in the hospital and look around then a nurse comes in and calls the doctor.

"Are you okay? How are you feeling? Does anything hurt?" He keeps asking me a bunch of questions.

"I'm fine and no, nothing hurts. What happened?" I ask the doctor and he sighs in relief.

"A car almost hit you, but your friend pushed you out of the way before it could."

"What? Who?!" I ask him hoping it wasn't who I think it is.

*Little time skip*

"You killed him!!" My dad screams in my face, I look around my sister is hugging my mom who is crying. "You selfish boy! You can never do anything right! He's gone and its all your fault!" He keeps yelling at me over and over until he slaps me. One slap turns in to five and five slaps become into ten kicks and the kicks become cuts; that one day becomes weeks, then, month and then years.

End of Flashback

"I killed him, I killed my first real friend, I killed my best friend, I killed my first love..., I KILLED HIM IT WAS ALL MY FAULT!!" I yell "It's always my fault no matter what." I look up ready to see faces of horror or disgust, but all I saw was worry in their eyes.

"M/n, what was his name?"

A new chapter??? Omg. It took me to a long time to write this even though it was short, Oops. Who knows when I'll update again. Anyways, like I said many times, I don't know where I'm going with this story. I just came up with this chapter today, so I'm sorry. Have a good day/night!