the loner

Chapter 18 - Fixing It

     It went to voicemail. Are you kidding?!? Here I was planning everything out thinking I would fix everything but I never thought of the possibility that maybe he has given up and doesn't want me to fix this. Ok, that's fine. If it's space he needs than it's space I'll give him. I called Luna. Hers went to voicemail too. I guess I messed that one up pretty bad. I felt panic rising up but I shoved it away. I was done feeling sorry for myself.
I tossed on some shorts, t-shirt, and sandals. I walked out to the backyard and walked up to the beach. I kicked off my sandals and stepped into the water, letting the saltwater coat my feet. I tilted my head back and closed my eyes feeling the wind run through my hair and over my face. I felt the vibrations coming from my pocket. Wait, what? I pulled out my phone. It was Calix. I quickly answered putting the phone up to my ear while simultaneously stepping out of the water and sliding my sandals back on.
"Hello?" I said tentatively.
"Jae?"
"Yup, that is my name." I tried to joke.
"Jeez I forgot how much I missed the sound of your voice." He said then paused, "I didn't mean to say that." I laughed nervously.
"So, uh, why are you calling?"
"Um you called me? I'm just calling you back. My dads funeral was today, that's why I didn't pick up the phone."
"Oh. I'm sorry, I should be there. I'm the worst friend." I heard him laugh. Why is he laughing?
"I think we've been equally shitty friends. Why were you calling?"
"I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I ruined everything. I'm cutting my trip short so I'll be home tomorrow night. I was thinking we should meet up and talk then?"
"Yeah I was thinking the same thing. How about that cafe on 5th? The one with the turquoise sign? I can't remember what it's called for the life of me." He stumbles out and I'm smiling ear-to-ear.
"Sounds great. How's Luna? I kinda messed things up with her." I admitted looking down at my sandaled feet.
"She's just worried about you. I'll tell her we talked though." I suddenly heard background noise full of unintelligible talking like a door had been opened. Then I heard someone talking urgently. "Hey I've gotta get back out there but I can't wait to see you. See you then?" He rushed out.
"Mmhmm see you then." I hung up. I could fix this. I knew it.

—————

I was at my aunt and uncles till lunch the next day and we had our goodbyes. All three of us trying not to cry and me swearing I'd be back soon. I got home around 7 that night.
"Welcome home!" My mom squealed pulling me into a bear hug. "I missed you!" I laughed.
"I missed you too! Can I go unpack now?" I asked.
"Yeah, yeah of course just happy to see you. Your dad is still at work but I know he'll be happy to see you too!" She released me and I went up to my room, rushing to unpack. I was meeting Calix at 7:45. I looked in my full length mirror for a once over. I had on a light brown tank top that had spaghetti straps that tied around my neck and acid washed jeans with a black leather jacket and suede ankle boots. My hair was tied above my head in my usual messy bun with strands falling around my face and made my turquoise eyes stick out brightly. I hadn't gotten my replacement contacts yet so I still had my glasses with gold frames on. I nodded and turned to leave. I drove quickly to the cafe but ended up getting there at 7:50. Close enough.
I turned the corner and there he was. He had his hands in his jeans pockets and was looking down at the sidewalk. It had only been a week but I realized when I looked at him how much I had missed him. I couldn't help myself. I ran toward him and he looked up, the sound of my heels hitting the sidewalk announcing to him that I was there. He instantly started beaming, his smile matching mine and he opened his arms. I launched myself into them. Tossing my arms around his neck and legs around his waist. I held him tightly, letting him know how much I missed him. He held just as tightly back. I quickly realized what I had just done and I untangled myself from him, putting down my feet and pulling my arms down.
"Uh, hi." I muttered, my shyness returning. We were still standing weirdly close so I took a step back. I could tell he was nervous, he kept looking back at the ground in nervousness and his hands returned to his jean pockets.
    "Hey sunshine." He said and I instantly blushed, looking down at my shoes. I cleared my throat making eye contact with him again.
    "Want to go in and get something?" I asked nodding toward the cafe, he nodded. He grabbed the door for me and we walked up to the counter.
"One peppermint tea, and whatever she wants on me." Calix said.
    "Oh, uh, no you really don't have to do that." I glanced between him and the barista quickly, his kindness stunning me.
     "Just tell the nice lady what you want, it's simple." He coaxed with a smile and I gave in.
     "One caramel latte please." I ordered my usual. Calix handed his card to the girl. I tried to stop him but he wouldn't have it.
     "You two are so cute!" She gushed. "I wish I had something like that." She shook her head and walked away from the counter, ending the conversation without even realizing it. She had thought we were a couple. Ha! If only! I love this gorgeous boy so much but it's not gonna happen. I looked down at my shoes sadly. I quickly changed my expression though and looked back up shooting Calix a look that said "did she really just think we were a couple?" He smirked back but it was distracted, almost concerned, we waited in silence for our drinks to be done. "Here you guys go, have a good night!" We grabbed our drinks and Calix looked at me.
     "Wanna go for a walk?" He proposed. I nodded.
     "Sounds good." We left the cafe and strolled along the sidewalks sipping on our drinks silently under the streetlights. We had been walking for a few minutes when I finally mustered up the courage to speak. "So I really just want to apologize, I don't expect anything to go back to how it was. Things are different now I get that. It's just gonna take some time to get used to." I rambled just spewing words that I didn't have any control over. Calix cut me off.
    "You're right things are different now." I looked down at my shoes, blinking back tears. I saw a bench and gestured to it and we both sat a foot apart from each other. "And I don't want to go back to how things were before." The space between us had halved. How'd that happen?
    "You know you're just making me feel worse right?" I cut in.
    "If you would just let me speak maybe you would feel better, or maybe you wouldn't. I don't know how you feel about me but I know now for sure how I feel about you." He looked at me intensely as if he was looking straight into my soul. "It only took me a week of being away from you to realize how much I need you and how I don't want to let you go." I looked at him and he grabbed one of my hands pressing it to his chest. His heart was beating abnormally fast. "This is how you effect me every time I see you. I go crazy if I see you with any other guy, and I go insane if I'm not near you." My heart started beating faster, was he saying... what I think he was saying? "What I'm trying to say, Jae, is that my biggest regret of my life is not asking you sooner to be mine. But I'm rectifying it now. What I'm trying to say is I want you to be mine. Only mine. So will you be my official girlfriend?" I was shocked, to say the least. My eyes were wide, my mouth slack. He took it the wrong way. "Oh uh I see. I'll just let you be. I'm sorry for fucking everything up." He moved to get up but I grabbed his wrist. I smiled and took his hand. Laying it against my chest. My heart was beating a million times per minute. I knew he felt it because his eyes widened. I grinned ear-to-ear. 
      "Yes." I said softly. Now he looked shocked, his expression slowly slid into a giddy smile.
     "I'm sorry, what was that? I didn't quite catch that." I rolled my eyes.
     "Yes!" I yelled and he laughed then grabbed me by the waist pulling me close. He leaned in close.
     "Thank you for a second chance." He whispered and I closed my eyes happily, leaning my head back. He delicately removed my glasses. He dropped a kiss onto my neck, then onto my eyelids, then both corners of my mouth.
    "Stop teasing." I groaned and planted my lips squarely on his. He pressed back instantly and gave me a kiss full of longing, relief, and hunger. We stayed like this for god knows how long, tangled together. We pulled back eventually and I wrapped my arms around his neck, holding him close. I smiled lazily at him and he returned it.
     "Shall we stroll?" I asked.
     "Whatever you want my lady." He said completely seriously and I laughed.
     We got up and strolled the streets, happier than I had ever been before. Eventually we ended up back at my car and the night had to come to an end.
"So. Spring break officially starts tomorrow," he said trying to hint at something.
"I'm aware." I smiled a little.
"Will I see you tomorrow?" He smirked.
"Most likely, yes. There's a spring festival I want to go to tomorrow, wanna come with?" I asked shyly. The annual spring festival I had planned on missing this year but since I was here, why not?
"I would love to. When should I pick you up?" He was grinning, glad to be around me again.
"How about 10:30? Is that ok?"
"Sounds perfect." He leaned down and have me a quick kiss on the lips and stepped back to walk to his car. I pouted for a second then waved and got in my car, felling that everything was right in the world once again.