These Four Dorks

Thinking & Marking Territory

I fell asleep thinking about all the boys really. Luke and how much he acts like he loves me, yet deep down I don't want to be over-reacting. Then Calum just being a flirtatious and amazing kisser and me always hoping he's not going to be too playful in front of Luke. And then how sweet and caring Ashton is, but how he kissed me, does he love me too? Do they all love me? Or are they just playing around? I feel bad all at the same time because what if they did have feelings for me, it would be my fault if any of them fell out. That's the last thing I want, to split the boys up. I feel like I'm sneaking around as well, I don't want to hurt anyone. But then again, I'm just over-reacting. They're so hot and I'm just not. They could have any girl in the world, so why would any of them ever have any feelings for me? They're just playing around which is cool. Nothing wrong with it. I'm just glad I'm letting them and not reminding myself of that boy and that little hut.

CALUM'S POV

All I could think about was Pixie. I wrapped myself in my blankets tightly, snuggling up in the warm bed. Luke was in the shower and Ashton was looking around with Michael. There was nothing to distract myself from thinking of her. I couldn't go and see her, she'd be sleeping. Her hair messy and strands falling over her face and her skin all soft and rosy. I wish I could kiss her again. Damn, she was a good kisser. And she was so nice too, she wouldn't push away or make it awkward, she'd be playful and not care. I just didn't want to have feelings for her. I was convinced that Luke did though, and I could never do anything like that to him. Yet, if they did start dating or whatever, I'd be jealous as fuck. I don't really know how I'd cope to be honest, I'd just have to try and stay strong, I guess.

ASHTON'S POV

As me and Michael walked along the little narrow cobblestone pathways and roads, letting the warm air blow through both of our crazy hair, all you could hear was the sea kissing the shore. The water lapping up to the yellow sand and the sun sinking on the horizon. No one spoke, no one coughed or snuffled, it was just us and the Portugese landscape. I looked around, spotting little caveways at the beach and finding hideaways in the shade of the sun. It would be so much better if Pixie was here too. Then I could hold her hand, or wrap my arms around her tiny waist. Then I could push her into one of those little caves at the beach and cuddle her to keep her warm from the ocean breeze. And play with her bleached hair and give her little pecks on her lips. Just to annoy her and tease her. But then I got confused. Do I really have feelings for her? Or was it just that kiss? I don't know if I'd want a relationship. But maybe when she kissed me back it was because she was messing around, not because she loved me or whatever.

LUKE'S POV

As the warm showering droplets hit my naked body, I closed my eyes peacefully, Pixie's face popping into my mind. Her little dimples when she smiles that you can only see if your staring right at her, so close to her you can see the hairs of her eybrows. Her hair bouncing when she runs or how she plays with her feet when she's feeling awkward or nervous. She's so dainty and perfect, why the fuck would that boy try to rape her. Anger swelled me up, fogging out how I felt for Pixie, if that was anything, and reminding myself of that stupid boy. He's a poor excuse for a human, Pixie didn't deserve that. And now she looks so happy but you can tell she's broken inside. I know those things that the fans were saying had got to her, I could tell she was trying to hold back tears. I just didn't want to annoy her, I knew she wanted to be left alone but I could of just kissed her forehead or whispered something sweet in her ear to make her feel good. She was battered and almost raped, for fucks sake, I don't think she needs to hear the words 'slut' or 'ugly' or 'fat' shouted at her. I punched the wall of the bathroom, the glass around the shower rattling. I just wish I could make her feel okay again. But, is she okay? I don't know but I just want her to be happy.