Most of us are hurting
Most of us are searching
Someone to love
Someone to understand
Most the time I'm fighting
Multiple voices residing
In my head
Then there's you
You bring silence to my violent truth
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"Are you ready?" Raven asked, as we walked up the stairs to the courthouse.
Today was the day that the DNA results would be revealed, the day that jidenna would be put on child support, the day that I would get full custody of my daughter and the day that I would finally let go off jidenna completely.
I used to think that taking him to court would make him want to be a father, that he would some how grow up and take responsibility for the child we created together. But, now I see that he can never be the father my daughter needs and I'm so grateful that Keraun has accepted her as his own and has taken over the roll as her father.
"I'm good, I'm just ready for this to be over with." I said, walking into the courthouse with Keraun, raven, Amber, Raegan and Heaven. I held Reagans hand while Keraun carried Heaven's car seat through the metal detector.
As we walked towards the courtroom, I began to get jittery and a little bit nervous. I knew that jidenna was her father and I was confident in knowing that the judge would award me full custody, I just was nervous to see how everything was going to pan out.
"Get ya stink ass breath away from me, forest whitaker." I heard raven say, causing me and amber to sigh.
"What you gon do about it, gorilla." He said, and then they began to fight outside of the courtroom, making Raegan laugh.
"Gimme my baby, that's enough." I laughed, grabbing Heaven's car seat while Keraun held raven in a chockhold. 'Just a bunch of kids' I though.
At the sound of my voice, they both stopped. Keraun began to fix his shirt while raven brushed her hair down with her hands with a mug on her face. I shook my head, playfully before walking into the courtroom.
"What the fuck?" I said aloud causing my mother and sister to turn around towards me. I couldn't even believe, they were literally sitting with jidenna and his mom on one side of the courtroom.
After all these years of fighting for my mothers love, I now knew that she didn't give a damn about me or her grandchild. I would've never expected this from her, especially my sister.
"Welcome, my name is judge faith. You can proceed to the right and take a seat." The judge said, breaking me out of my trancelike state.
Keraun kissed my cheek, picking up Raegan and grabbing my hand, guiding me towards our section. I could feel their eyes on me and all I could feel was complete disgust. She was suppose to be my mother, she was suppose to protect me, her flesh and blood at all cost and here she is glaring at me like I did something.
